Posts
I know a couple people right now who are lost in the darkness.
They can't find their way home because it is dark in their heads and they are only looking inwards.
When you are depressed, anxious, lost, afraid...
look outside yourself.
There are lights there...
in a star...
a candle...
a beacon...
a child's drawing.
There can be light at the other end of a phone...
in an email...
in your favorite food...
a conversation...
a book...
a movie...
a smile...
or a great piece of music.(see below)
Too many people are giving up.
That's because they are not looking for the lights.
Light is all around us.
In life...
just like in death...
lights will guide you home.
You just have to look hard sometimes to see those little beacons of hope.
Friday, December 9, 2011
Wednesday, December 7, 2011
Monday, November 28, 2011
Poison
Before I hit the road, I'll hit the blog with some music. I think it's the perfect accompaniment for today's cases and mindset.... being, domestics. Domestic cases involved people within families and relationships in conflict -- who sometimes who bring deadly harm to their own.
Poison has always a popular way to do a nemesis in. In fact, I have known a few people in my career who have allegedly been poisoned. Two by their lovers for certain.
So when I came across the following song, I saved it for the day, I had to hit both the blog and road fast.
This would be that song.
It's not for kids, way too adult for that.
Besides.... kids have plenty of evil schemes of their own, why inject even more diabolical concepts in to their impressionable minds?
It's just this song has a a deeper meaning to me.
It does speak of poisons of the body.
It also sings of poisons to the mind...
and how toxic relationships can truly be.
Before you leap into love...
study the pit first.
You can't know a person... truly know a person.... until the first blush, hormones, madness of love wears off.
Some people are gifts to the planet and your life.
Others, are simply... poison.
Poison has always a popular way to do a nemesis in. In fact, I have known a few people in my career who have allegedly been poisoned. Two by their lovers for certain.
So when I came across the following song, I saved it for the day, I had to hit both the blog and road fast.
This would be that song.
It's not for kids, way too adult for that.
Besides.... kids have plenty of evil schemes of their own, why inject even more diabolical concepts in to their impressionable minds?
It's just this song has a a deeper meaning to me.
It does speak of poisons of the body.
It also sings of poisons to the mind...
and how toxic relationships can truly be.
Before you leap into love...
study the pit first.
You can't know a person... truly know a person.... until the first blush, hormones, madness of love wears off.
Some people are gifts to the planet and your life.
Others, are simply... poison.
Sunday, November 27, 2011
24/7
Being a PI is really a 24/7 job.
You never know when trouble happens....or is about to.
Whether you're on a surveillance, running a background, or banging on doors to find a witness, serve a subpoena, whatever...
so much of it happens in dark places after dark.
And here in the Pacific Northwest corner of the US...
which we also call the Great Northwest because it is truly great to those who love storms and moss on the soles of our shoes...
the work is often done under gray skies, soaked streets, teeming rain or black ice.
This is a land of water, evergreens, rivers, mountains and farmlands.
WA State is big and vast and my work territory is all of it.
On TV, PI work seems so glamorous.
Truly NOT.
It's not glamorous to step over a pile of pee in the hallway of housing unit run by a slumlord.
It's no fun being a blond woman approaching or passing a group of male gang-bangers.
And it's not my idea of good time knocking on a door that could be answered by a charging pitbull...
or sitting on seat that could have a hypodermic needle on it.
Or talking to someone twenty years younger than you who looks twenty years older because of the drugs they've injected.
Fortunately, you spend enough time at this business and you learn just how to handle these things.
And you learn when to say No. So sorry. No can, No will, Don't wanna', think I'll pass.
That's because PI's can say no.
Police can't.
When I am sent somewhere by an attorney, or on a case that takes me off a main road...
into the northwest wilderness...
and the road is all mud and gravel...
the trailers I pass show indications of drug manufacture...
the signs along the way say "Go Away"....
I tend to go away.
Because I can.
I don't back down often, however, it is my choice whether to deal with something uber dangerous or not.
Police don't have that choice.
They are told where to go, when.
They know every call, every stop they make, could be their last.
Yet still, they go in...
and that's why so many police die.
Protecting us, from ourselves.
PI work gives PI's autonomy and independence police don't have.
When we are self employed, we can say to our employers that powerful word, "No."
And when we say no, the worst thing that happens is they send another investigator in.
Still, the job never leaves our heads.
I imagine the head part is similar to being a cop.
Being a PI is not 9-5 and never will be unless you go to someone else's PI Agency and work for them. Even so, you will be working odd ours.
The hard part is getting it all out of our heads when it is time to go to that place called "home."
Police have staff psychologists, therapists, stress consults.
PI's have nada except other PI's.
Or blogs, lol,
Be careful out there today.
And if you are inside, warm and safe count your blessings.
Alot of people out there are physically, psychologically, emotionally and financially hurting.
This is a time for compassion not capitalism...
It's a season for consideration... for respecting those who need respect the most.
The fallen.
24/7.... even when I dream... I have someone in my head who hurts.
Or needs help, advice, direction.
A real PI's life is not like a TV show or movie you step away from.
You are one with the force, be it good or bad, all the time.
You never know when trouble happens....or is about to.
Whether you're on a surveillance, running a background, or banging on doors to find a witness, serve a subpoena, whatever...
so much of it happens in dark places after dark.
And here in the Pacific Northwest corner of the US...
which we also call the Great Northwest because it is truly great to those who love storms and moss on the soles of our shoes...
the work is often done under gray skies, soaked streets, teeming rain or black ice.
This is a land of water, evergreens, rivers, mountains and farmlands.
WA State is big and vast and my work territory is all of it.
On TV, PI work seems so glamorous.
Truly NOT.
It's not glamorous to step over a pile of pee in the hallway of housing unit run by a slumlord.
It's no fun being a blond woman approaching or passing a group of male gang-bangers.
And it's not my idea of good time knocking on a door that could be answered by a charging pitbull...
or sitting on seat that could have a hypodermic needle on it.
Or talking to someone twenty years younger than you who looks twenty years older because of the drugs they've injected.
Fortunately, you spend enough time at this business and you learn just how to handle these things.
And you learn when to say No. So sorry. No can, No will, Don't wanna', think I'll pass.
That's because PI's can say no.
Police can't.
When I am sent somewhere by an attorney, or on a case that takes me off a main road...
into the northwest wilderness...
and the road is all mud and gravel...
the trailers I pass show indications of drug manufacture...
the signs along the way say "Go Away"....
I tend to go away.
Because I can.
I don't back down often, however, it is my choice whether to deal with something uber dangerous or not.
Police don't have that choice.
They are told where to go, when.
They know every call, every stop they make, could be their last.
Yet still, they go in...
and that's why so many police die.
Protecting us, from ourselves.
PI work gives PI's autonomy and independence police don't have.
When we are self employed, we can say to our employers that powerful word, "No."
And when we say no, the worst thing that happens is they send another investigator in.
Still, the job never leaves our heads.
I imagine the head part is similar to being a cop.
Being a PI is not 9-5 and never will be unless you go to someone else's PI Agency and work for them. Even so, you will be working odd ours.
The hard part is getting it all out of our heads when it is time to go to that place called "home."
Police have staff psychologists, therapists, stress consults.
PI's have nada except other PI's.
Or blogs, lol,
Be careful out there today.
And if you are inside, warm and safe count your blessings.
Alot of people out there are physically, psychologically, emotionally and financially hurting.
This is a time for compassion not capitalism...
It's a season for consideration... for respecting those who need respect the most.
The fallen.
24/7.... even when I dream... I have someone in my head who hurts.
Or needs help, advice, direction.
A real PI's life is not like a TV show or movie you step away from.
You are one with the force, be it good or bad, all the time.
Friday, November 25, 2011
Pedal to the Metal
I apologize for disappearing. I was struggling between writing a book or expanding this blog.
It looks like the blog has won.
Being a full time PI, rather busy right now, what I need most is time and added brain power to pull off this expansion.
So, the progress will be slow and steady...
as I get up to speed on how to monetize and best utilize this medium for my message.
There's a comments section after each blog post.
Feel free to use it... it helps on a number of levels...
and share this link with anyone you choose.
The ultimate goal is to provide information to as many as I can...
because information is power.
It's what can save a life..
or destroy it.
The following video is way too grim to post on Facebook.
I figured it was the perfect addition before I head out to investigate a tragic vehicle accident today.
Remember, there are no real holidays for police, first responders, paramedics, life flight pilots and their med teams, er docs, hospital staff and most of all...
the innocent victims of guilty people who text and make calls while they drive... eat while they drive...
drag race.
There is no text, no call, no need greater on this planet ...when driving... to keep your hands on the wheels, your eyes focused and keep a safe distance from the loose cannons and semi's on the road.
Truth is, we never know when some distracted, drunk or deviant driver could take us, or a whole whole family out.
I was driving last night with a car full of people I love, in the rain, the cold, on freeways, up a mountain.
And I felt their lives in my hand.
Nothing felt better last night, besides an incredibly great Thanksgiving dinner and evening with equal great people...
than to get everyone safely home....
get my car parked and know...
we lived to see another day.
Doesn't take a brain surgeon to see, I am quite passionate about this subject.
That's because I have investigated not hundreds, but thousands of motor vehicle accidents.
I get the concept.
Car = missile.
Now we must pass the equation on to our young, our new drivers....
the ones devouring video games about car racing, grand theft of the auto variety...
and of course, all the fast and furious movies that make me furious, because we are creating a whole new generation of reckless, young drivers who think they are all that...and a bag of chips.
The video below is not easy to watch.
It is powerful and it is important.
It's what I see on the job.
And it's what you might consider showing a young cocky driver with his or her first car.
Thanks for coming back to the blog.
You will keep it going... and growing... just by showing up.
Please feel free to share this link.
There are some mighty thick heads we all have to get through to.
It looks like the blog has won.
Being a full time PI, rather busy right now, what I need most is time and added brain power to pull off this expansion.
So, the progress will be slow and steady...
as I get up to speed on how to monetize and best utilize this medium for my message.
There's a comments section after each blog post.
Feel free to use it... it helps on a number of levels...
and share this link with anyone you choose.
The ultimate goal is to provide information to as many as I can...
because information is power.
It's what can save a life..
or destroy it.
The following video is way too grim to post on Facebook.
I figured it was the perfect addition before I head out to investigate a tragic vehicle accident today.
Remember, there are no real holidays for police, first responders, paramedics, life flight pilots and their med teams, er docs, hospital staff and most of all...
the innocent victims of guilty people who text and make calls while they drive... eat while they drive...
drag race.
There is no text, no call, no need greater on this planet ...when driving... to keep your hands on the wheels, your eyes focused and keep a safe distance from the loose cannons and semi's on the road.
Truth is, we never know when some distracted, drunk or deviant driver could take us, or a whole whole family out.
I was driving last night with a car full of people I love, in the rain, the cold, on freeways, up a mountain.
And I felt their lives in my hand.
Nothing felt better last night, besides an incredibly great Thanksgiving dinner and evening with equal great people...
than to get everyone safely home....
get my car parked and know...
we lived to see another day.
Doesn't take a brain surgeon to see, I am quite passionate about this subject.
That's because I have investigated not hundreds, but thousands of motor vehicle accidents.
I get the concept.
Car = missile.
Now we must pass the equation on to our young, our new drivers....
the ones devouring video games about car racing, grand theft of the auto variety...
and of course, all the fast and furious movies that make me furious, because we are creating a whole new generation of reckless, young drivers who think they are all that...and a bag of chips.
The video below is not easy to watch.
It is powerful and it is important.
It's what I see on the job.
And it's what you might consider showing a young cocky driver with his or her first car.
Thanks for coming back to the blog.
You will keep it going... and growing... just by showing up.
Please feel free to share this link.
There are some mighty thick heads we all have to get through to.
Tuesday, October 25, 2011
Bad Neighbors
During my interviews lately, I am meeting a lot of good people in nice houses.
My interview always involves establishing "rapport"-- a mutual respect for the subject of that interview.
The goal is to elicit information and to assess the credibility of the person I am talking to, which reflects on the credibility of information provided.
So lately...
in the last couple of years...
I am encountering a similar situation which I now wonder is a trend before I head out for the day.
The scenario goes something like this:
I meet someone in their house somewhere for an interview.
This person lives in a nice, decent house. Often an impressive house, meticulously kept, lots of property, fencing. Almost always a dog or two.
Yet their lovely little house may have a dilapidated, unkempt house behind it.
Or a property behind it spotted with trailers.
Often these secret properties are hidden by bushes, walls, fences, even chain links between trees.
Whatever that dark place behind to my subject's property is...
behind the barbed, or broken wood plank fences, h there are bad people in crack houses or meth labs.
And when those bad people get high at night, like vampires and zombies, they are not good to their neighbors.
So this one man I was interviewing recently, is a very good person fixing up a foreclosure and living in it during the process. His goal is to turn the property in three months.
It has a backyard retaining wall.
He didn't know, until after he bought the place that behind that retaining wall, is a small house surrounded by multiple trailers occupied by many people.... all related, of all ages, who are allegedly manufacturing crack.
He has since heard them referred to as a crime family.
Though this man I was interviewing, he didn't know how evil they were when he filed one police report against them.
Nor did he realize his identifying information would be on that police report.He has been haunted ever since.
Like a pack of wolves hungry for food at night, this tribe of whacked out, drugged out dope heads wanders by his house, gun their antiquated engines as they drive by the front yard.
And there are other things they do I can not describe here. The police are doing their best, yet still can do vitually nothing.
They lock some up,
Others stay home and crimes contnue to multiply.
There are bails paid, people released and victims harassed.
Crime is how some families earn their livings.
"What can I I do" he asks me, after I listen to this story and tell him I can see it is getting to him for good reasons.
He lives alone. He's a big tough guy, mid-40's.
The police can only protect him so much.
Once meth and crack kick in, so does the danger.
"Move," I tell him.
"You live alone. Nothing's stopped them.You have cameras, guns, motion detectors, alarm systems, dogs and still these guy are driving you crazy. The police have told you how dangerous they are, they have an investigation underway. Either stay and risk damage or death. Or go. Sell your house, rent your house, walk away from your house... but get away with your life."
I know he wanted to stand his ground. He has every right to.
But why be the lone outpost surrounded by hostiles with no cavalry available?
He was told by the police to just stay away, there's big stuff going down.
When I am advised by a police detective they are looking at the same subject I am on a "higher, inter-organizational, multi-jurisdictional level"....
I am respectfully asked to step away, lest I compromise any ongoing investigation....
I graciously and respectfully step away.
I suggested he do the same.
Truth be told, I have no clue what he will do.
He is stuck between a rock and a hard place in this economy.
Will he be Custer and make his house is last stand?
Or will he retreat, as I have , from a growingly hostile and crowded urban environment.
The same environment I must head back to now on a case...
My interview always involves establishing "rapport"-- a mutual respect for the subject of that interview.
The goal is to elicit information and to assess the credibility of the person I am talking to, which reflects on the credibility of information provided.
So lately...
in the last couple of years...
I am encountering a similar situation which I now wonder is a trend before I head out for the day.
The scenario goes something like this:
I meet someone in their house somewhere for an interview.
This person lives in a nice, decent house. Often an impressive house, meticulously kept, lots of property, fencing. Almost always a dog or two.
Yet their lovely little house may have a dilapidated, unkempt house behind it.
Or a property behind it spotted with trailers.
Often these secret properties are hidden by bushes, walls, fences, even chain links between trees.
Whatever that dark place behind to my subject's property is...
behind the barbed, or broken wood plank fences, h there are bad people in crack houses or meth labs.
And when those bad people get high at night, like vampires and zombies, they are not good to their neighbors.
So this one man I was interviewing recently, is a very good person fixing up a foreclosure and living in it during the process. His goal is to turn the property in three months.
It has a backyard retaining wall.
He didn't know, until after he bought the place that behind that retaining wall, is a small house surrounded by multiple trailers occupied by many people.... all related, of all ages, who are allegedly manufacturing crack.
He has since heard them referred to as a crime family.
Though this man I was interviewing, he didn't know how evil they were when he filed one police report against them.
Nor did he realize his identifying information would be on that police report.He has been haunted ever since.
Like a pack of wolves hungry for food at night, this tribe of whacked out, drugged out dope heads wanders by his house, gun their antiquated engines as they drive by the front yard.
And there are other things they do I can not describe here. The police are doing their best, yet still can do vitually nothing.
They lock some up,
Others stay home and crimes contnue to multiply.
There are bails paid, people released and victims harassed.
Crime is how some families earn their livings.
"What can I I do" he asks me, after I listen to this story and tell him I can see it is getting to him for good reasons.
He lives alone. He's a big tough guy, mid-40's.
The police can only protect him so much.
Once meth and crack kick in, so does the danger.
"Move," I tell him.
"You live alone. Nothing's stopped them.You have cameras, guns, motion detectors, alarm systems, dogs and still these guy are driving you crazy. The police have told you how dangerous they are, they have an investigation underway. Either stay and risk damage or death. Or go. Sell your house, rent your house, walk away from your house... but get away with your life."
I know he wanted to stand his ground. He has every right to.
But why be the lone outpost surrounded by hostiles with no cavalry available?
He was told by the police to just stay away, there's big stuff going down.
When I am advised by a police detective they are looking at the same subject I am on a "higher, inter-organizational, multi-jurisdictional level"....
I am respectfully asked to step away, lest I compromise any ongoing investigation....
I graciously and respectfully step away.
I suggested he do the same.
Truth be told, I have no clue what he will do.
He is stuck between a rock and a hard place in this economy.
Will he be Custer and make his house is last stand?
Or will he retreat, as I have , from a growingly hostile and crowded urban environment.
The same environment I must head back to now on a case...
Monday, October 24, 2011
Musical Confession
Decided to start this week with an old, very old favorite.
The self-defense angle is fascinating.
Who shot the sheriff?
Either this confession is true or false...
or someone else is holding the bag, or other gun.
Maybe the confessor is deflecting.
I never seen a confession like this once... and it is certainly melodious, albeit incriminating.
Regardless, a word of advice, before beginning my day's work and hitting the long road....
singing your murder confession is not likely to be helpful to your case.
The self-defense angle is fascinating.
Who shot the sheriff?
Either this confession is true or false...
or someone else is holding the bag, or other gun.
Maybe the confessor is deflecting.
I never seen a confession like this once... and it is certainly melodious, albeit incriminating.
Regardless, a word of advice, before beginning my day's work and hitting the long road....
singing your murder confession is not likely to be helpful to your case.
Saturday, October 22, 2011
The Blogger's Back in Town
I missed the blog... and decided not to let it go into hiatus for a number of reasons I will spare you.
Let's just say life is an ocean and I ride its ebbs and tides. When a storm comes, I prepare for it...
batten down those hatches, secure those loose lines, turn bow into the wind.
Today marks one such shift in the weather.
I woke to a very dark and moody Pacific Northwest morning with three things on my mind.
Coffee, murder and mayhem.
The coffee, available in the kitchen.
The murder in a case file in front of me.
The mayhem in the various corners of this beach house on the bay.
Today I decided to quietly reignite the blog or a number of reasons.
In this cyber world it's a good way to send smoke signals to the planet on a daily basis.
And readership logs indicate readers world wide.
Legend has it, a blog is also a good way to make money.
However I haven't had the time or inclination to figure that angle out yet.
Bottom line, the blog is back...
and I'm glad whoever is reading this is back too.
The world's become askew as of late.
We need places to we can seek solace or cover.
We need sources to fuel our insatiable appetite for information.
And we need to help others.
In the days ahead, the blog... and my P.I. business... will be growing.
It's my way of adapting to the depression we're in....
which, for some reason, the government and politicians prefer to call a recession.
While I'm glad a whole slew of old dictators have left the planet and the troops are pulling out of Iraq, that's not going to help the state of our economy, the amount of war, famine, illness, injury, unemployment and disenchantment among us.
The American economy can and will continue to tank.
I'm the first to admit P.I.'s are not necessarily he most optimistic of people because we see the worst side of life.
However, most of us love what we do because we believe we make a difference. And we often do.
I also think people who read this blog, think about the same way I do.
We need to team up to stay safe and grounded in an unstable world which is rapidly becoming even more unhinged.
So come back every day and I will too.
Share the blog with you anyone you'd like it and help me build readership so we can all spread information that can help save lives...
or lighten those hard or lonely lives burdened by the dark side.
These are not easy days...
Let this blog be a place of both retreat and information to keep you safe.
And a place I can offload the words and images that can haunt the head of a PI.
Let's just say life is an ocean and I ride its ebbs and tides. When a storm comes, I prepare for it...
batten down those hatches, secure those loose lines, turn bow into the wind.
Today marks one such shift in the weather.
I woke to a very dark and moody Pacific Northwest morning with three things on my mind.
Coffee, murder and mayhem.
The coffee, available in the kitchen.
The murder in a case file in front of me.
The mayhem in the various corners of this beach house on the bay.
Today I decided to quietly reignite the blog or a number of reasons.
In this cyber world it's a good way to send smoke signals to the planet on a daily basis.
And readership logs indicate readers world wide.
Legend has it, a blog is also a good way to make money.
However I haven't had the time or inclination to figure that angle out yet.
Bottom line, the blog is back...
and I'm glad whoever is reading this is back too.
The world's become askew as of late.
We need places to we can seek solace or cover.
We need sources to fuel our insatiable appetite for information.
And we need to help others.
In the days ahead, the blog... and my P.I. business... will be growing.
It's my way of adapting to the depression we're in....
which, for some reason, the government and politicians prefer to call a recession.
While I'm glad a whole slew of old dictators have left the planet and the troops are pulling out of Iraq, that's not going to help the state of our economy, the amount of war, famine, illness, injury, unemployment and disenchantment among us.
The American economy can and will continue to tank.
I'm the first to admit P.I.'s are not necessarily he most optimistic of people because we see the worst side of life.
However, most of us love what we do because we believe we make a difference. And we often do.
I also think people who read this blog, think about the same way I do.
We need to team up to stay safe and grounded in an unstable world which is rapidly becoming even more unhinged.
So come back every day and I will too.
Share the blog with you anyone you'd like it and help me build readership so we can all spread information that can help save lives...
or lighten those hard or lonely lives burdened by the dark side.
These are not easy days...
Let this blog be a place of both retreat and information to keep you safe.
And a place I can offload the words and images that can haunt the head of a PI.
Monday, October 3, 2011
Re: Amanda Knox Verdict
Hindsight being 20/20 vision, even those with super powers could not imagine Amanda would be held in prison so long for a crime she did not commit.
A crime for which another man was already convicted and serving time.
However, the prosecutor, in my opinion, had a few screws lose.
And the media attention certainly didn't hurt the Italian economy any.
In fact, money came into the country quickly with all the false allegations made against Amanda the alleged "she devil."
This was clearly a case a prosecutorial misconduct, among other things.
I am pleased with the fact that justice has been served in this case.
That would be one for Amanda, her co-defendant and their families and friends.
I hear now everyone in her her life has spent everything they had to help free Amanda.
Amanda's grandmother is broke.
False allegations, accusations, are like ripples on the water.
Not only does the defendant experience that ripple effect, that effect extends to family, friends of both victims and plaintiffs.
I do know Amanda and her family will recover from this.
The media will be all over it with huge financial officers I hope, which will no doubt, go to Amanda's legal bills.
I have no clue how the victim's family will respond.
It is doubtful they will close the case on this.
Regardless, just a few days ago, here's what Amanda's mother had to say on the subject.
She was right.
A crime for which another man was already convicted and serving time.
However, the prosecutor, in my opinion, had a few screws lose.
And the media attention certainly didn't hurt the Italian economy any.
In fact, money came into the country quickly with all the false allegations made against Amanda the alleged "she devil."
This was clearly a case a prosecutorial misconduct, among other things.
I am pleased with the fact that justice has been served in this case.
That would be one for Amanda, her co-defendant and their families and friends.
I hear now everyone in her her life has spent everything they had to help free Amanda.
Amanda's grandmother is broke.
False allegations, accusations, are like ripples on the water.
Not only does the defendant experience that ripple effect, that effect extends to family, friends of both victims and plaintiffs.
I do know Amanda and her family will recover from this.
The media will be all over it with huge financial officers I hope, which will no doubt, go to Amanda's legal bills.
I have no clue how the victim's family will respond.
It is doubtful they will close the case on this.
Regardless, just a few days ago, here's what Amanda's mother had to say on the subject.
She was right.
Sunday, October 2, 2011
Questions, Questions, Questions
When people say to me, "I need to ask you a stupid question," I usually reply "there is no stupid question."
Truth be told, I think my family and friends will bear witness to the fact that I ask too many questions. Even worse, I am constantly asking them "Do you think I ask too many questions?"
Which is, indeed, a question.
I wasn't always like this.
It started happening to me after I got burnt once, then twice...
and then as I moved through this process called life, I kept getting burned without seeing the flame coming.
At some point, I got the bright idea that asking questions could divert melt downs.
As I've gotten older, I've learned to walk on fire.
In the past... I got burned all those times, not because I didn't ask the questions, or the right ones, in the right place in the right time.
I got burnt because I figured ignorance was bliss and I'd run with it.
I didn't know then, as I do now, that a attorney never asks someone a question on the stand that he doesn't know the answer to already.
Sometimes, only the strongest or safest among us feel comfortable asking the questions that reveal truths and lies.
I've been posting about Susan Powell's case the past couple of days.
And I have names in my head I can not share with you because those are clients and protected by Invesigator/Client confidence.For every case, client, witness, police officer, first responder, whoever, there is my legal pad and list of questions.
So a friend I questioned/interrogated yesterday, pointed out my "inqusitive" nature in a kind way that got me thinking.
Then she sent me the following You Tube this morning.
I like it for a number of reasons.
I think the people we entrust our money to are not always qualified just because they appear to have the certifications, appear affluent and talk a good game.
I think someone who comes in our homes to do a repair isn't necessarily competent because they got a truck with a company name painted on it and a name tag on their shirt.
I think the people we lay next to at night are not always good, well-intentioned people simply because we sleep next to them.
This one's for all the women out there...and the men...who've been taken.
Whenever you can can, ask questions. Make a list of them. They can be quite revealing.
In some cases, like Susan's, even she they asked the questions, all the right questions, a pathological liar could bypass them.
Or another person could kill you for asking them.
So... sometimes.... even questions aren't enough to save a relationship or a life.
Questions certainly are, however, a great start.
Truth be told, I think my family and friends will bear witness to the fact that I ask too many questions. Even worse, I am constantly asking them "Do you think I ask too many questions?"
Which is, indeed, a question.
I wasn't always like this.
It started happening to me after I got burnt once, then twice...
and then as I moved through this process called life, I kept getting burned without seeing the flame coming.
At some point, I got the bright idea that asking questions could divert melt downs.
As I've gotten older, I've learned to walk on fire.
In the past... I got burned all those times, not because I didn't ask the questions, or the right ones, in the right place in the right time.
I got burnt because I figured ignorance was bliss and I'd run with it.
I didn't know then, as I do now, that a attorney never asks someone a question on the stand that he doesn't know the answer to already.
Sometimes, only the strongest or safest among us feel comfortable asking the questions that reveal truths and lies.
I've been posting about Susan Powell's case the past couple of days.
And I have names in my head I can not share with you because those are clients and protected by Invesigator/Client confidence.For every case, client, witness, police officer, first responder, whoever, there is my legal pad and list of questions.
So a friend I questioned/interrogated yesterday, pointed out my "inqusitive" nature in a kind way that got me thinking.
Then she sent me the following You Tube this morning.
I like it for a number of reasons.
I think the people we entrust our money to are not always qualified just because they appear to have the certifications, appear affluent and talk a good game.
I think someone who comes in our homes to do a repair isn't necessarily competent because they got a truck with a company name painted on it and a name tag on their shirt.
I think the people we lay next to at night are not always good, well-intentioned people simply because we sleep next to them.
This one's for all the women out there...and the men...who've been taken.
Whenever you can can, ask questions. Make a list of them. They can be quite revealing.
In some cases, like Susan's, even she they asked the questions, all the right questions, a pathological liar could bypass them.
Or another person could kill you for asking them.
So... sometimes.... even questions aren't enough to save a relationship or a life.
Questions certainly are, however, a great start.
Saturday, October 1, 2011
RE: The Susan Powell Case Tipping Point
The story at the end of this post links you to the most current update I could locate on the Susan Powell case before heading out on weekend rounds.
It's from ABC in Salt Lake City, the location of the search and likely murder or or abduction search.
I remain hopeful about the desert finds and anxious for DNA results which take a whole lot longer than the one hour they show you on CSI.
We are talking months.
But they have material.
They have trace evidence.
They have things burned.
And the more I think about it,
the more I realize how hard it would be to bury a body in a freezing Utah desert in the middle of the night while taking care of your two sons.
If Grampa showed up to help his son in Utah, from Puyallup, the task would be even easier.
Though dad could do it all by himself.
Regardless, I'm thinking the police and search crews are thinking the same way I am.
There must be a grave, though unlikely.
More likely, campfire. Cremation.
I don't want that and don't feel good posting that possibility here knowing some of Susan's family may read it because it is a horrifying thought.
Fortunately though, Susan's Powell's family has her kids.
Unfortunately, this disappearance, this murder, the snatched, stolen children, young adults, mothers, sons, babies, it never ends.
There is another missing person in our area, Linsdey Baum, a young girl snatched right off the streets by who knows who and taken who knows where. She has Facebook page you can join. And here's a link to her official website.
http://www.findlindseybaum.com/
I often work in or near Lindsey's town, where she was abducted.
Between cases, I have stopped by the thick wooded areas alongside with my dog and just ventured here and there for a look see, where I would imagine someone could be killed and hidden.
There is a burial ground for the green river Killer's bodies here in Washington.
It is up in the mountains and there were more bodies there than there were victims of the Green River Killer. Think about that for a minute if you feel like walking in the dark lands.
Given Josh's father's inclinations for child porn.... and his lust for daughter in law Susan Powell (which really had her concerned according to her friends and her journal), it is indeed possible she wasn't killed sold into some kind of white slave trade.
That idea frightens me, oddly, more than death.
Though I think it unlikely.
Either way, this story will not end quickly or fast enough for anyone until Susan is found.
And that's what today's post is about.
Here's a link to the what they're finding in the Utah desert searches which still go on.
http://www.abc4.com/s/UKndT35q0kSO43n678Qesw.cspx#.TocxiNh6c48.blogger
It's from ABC in Salt Lake City, the location of the search and likely murder or or abduction search.
I remain hopeful about the desert finds and anxious for DNA results which take a whole lot longer than the one hour they show you on CSI.
We are talking months.
But they have material.
They have trace evidence.
They have things burned.And the more I think about it,
the more I realize how hard it would be to bury a body in a freezing Utah desert in the middle of the night while taking care of your two sons.
If Grampa showed up to help his son in Utah, from Puyallup, the task would be even easier.
Though dad could do it all by himself.
Regardless, I'm thinking the police and search crews are thinking the same way I am.
There must be a grave, though unlikely.
More likely, campfire. Cremation.
I don't want that and don't feel good posting that possibility here knowing some of Susan's family may read it because it is a horrifying thought.
Fortunately though, Susan's Powell's family has her kids.
Unfortunately, this disappearance, this murder, the snatched, stolen children, young adults, mothers, sons, babies, it never ends.
| Lindsey Baum |
http://www.findlindseybaum.com/
I often work in or near Lindsey's town, where she was abducted.
Between cases, I have stopped by the thick wooded areas alongside with my dog and just ventured here and there for a look see, where I would imagine someone could be killed and hidden.
There is a burial ground for the green river Killer's bodies here in Washington.
It is up in the mountains and there were more bodies there than there were victims of the Green River Killer. Think about that for a minute if you feel like walking in the dark lands.
Given Josh's father's inclinations for child porn.... and his lust for daughter in law Susan Powell (which really had her concerned according to her friends and her journal), it is indeed possible she wasn't killed sold into some kind of white slave trade.
That idea frightens me, oddly, more than death.
Though I think it unlikely.
Either way, this story will not end quickly or fast enough for anyone until Susan is found.
And that's what today's post is about.
Here's a link to the what they're finding in the Utah desert searches which still go on.
http://www.abc4.com/s/UKndT35q0kSO43n678Qesw.cspx#.TocxiNh6c48.blogger
Friday, September 30, 2011
Susan Powell Case Update
In August, Josh Powell's own sister, Jennifer Graves, suspected him of murdering Susan Powell, her sister in law.
This is not to say sisters can't and aren't wrong in the false allegation department
However, I believe this sister, Jennifer, speaks the truth.
This is a known fact.
In Utah, Josh Powell took his two young sons from their warm home to go camping in the middle of freezing desert winter night.
The boys then were ages 2 and 4.
Shortly during, after, or before... Susan Powell, Josh's wife, the boys mother, disappeared.
POOF! Susan Powell is gone. No one can find her.
Though the search teams in the Utah desert have picked up a trail, a scent, a glimmer of possibility of a find.
Josh claims she left him and the boys for another man.
Like we, the world, her family, her own sons would believe that based on the evidence.
Josh even alleged she came on to his own father.
Puh-lease.
Study Susan Powell. She would never, ever leave her sons.
I didn't believe Josh's lies for a heartbeat.
Good thing the cops didn't either.
Regardless, after Susan Powell mysteriously disappeared...
(who according to her husband... abandoned everything she owned including her maternal instinct)
Josh Powell packed up his sons and moved to a town called Puyallup, Washington.... not too far from me... to live with his dad, Grampa, Steven Powell.
One major problem there.
Susan father in law, Steven Powell, is sex pervert, who especially like porno pictures of children and had quite an affinity for Josh's wife Susan... the subject of this blog post who has disappeared.
The way he harassed Susan was one reason she initially moved her from Puyallup to Utah in the first place .... to get away from Josh's dear old demented dad.
On August 25, 2011, after Susan's disappearance, Jennifer Graves, Josh's own sister, Susan's sister-in-law, spoke to the media and asked Josh's dad to stop "slandering Susan". http://www.fox13now.com/news/kstu-josh-powells-sister-says-susan-didnt-feel-safe-near-her-father-20110825,0,4879996.story
It seems Susan told her friends and family what was going down with her husband's dysfunctional family.
She also kept a journal of the nasty moves her father in law made around her.
People knew she was in a toxic situation.
Then, go figure... one icy, freezing, midnight, Josh takes his boys camping in the Utah desert.
They are 2 and 4 years old. Susan doesn't go. And Susan Powell is never seen since.
Josh decides to take the two boys and leave Utah rather than join the search for his wife. they went to live with his father, Steven Powell in Puyallup Washington.
So of course, the whole situation stinks bigtime and people are pretty freaked out both here and in Utah. Yet karma can really serve it back.
So Gramps, Steven Powell, was just busted, (amen) for his porn stash.
Here's the link to that story. He's still in jail now.
I just checked.
http://articles.nydailynews.com/2011-09-23/news/30214884_1_susan-powell-josh-powell-steven-powell
But Susan is still unfound.
And with Steven Powell, Grampa, now busted, behind bars here in Washington....
that left the boys living with a possible murderer. Their dad.
Yet there is a measure of good news in this sordid story.
The tides are turning now.
The courts have awarded temporary custody of the boy's to Josh's parents.
The temporary part is not good news.
For now however, the boys are safely in the loving, arms of very good people.
All while, Susan Powell's devastated family and friends, and really big-hearted strangers are still searching for what may remain of her body which I believe was buried or burned in the Utah desert.
And Josh Powell's own sister has gone on recor again, this time, saying he should never be awarded custody.
Check that out here: http://www.komonews.com/news/local/130734733.html?skipthumb=Y
I drove by Steven and Josh Powell's home again on my way home from a case in that area yesterday. It felt great to know the kids weren't there anymore... that Susan's parents won the custody battle...
and Josh's time is coming.
I pray the search parties, the police, dogs, someone... finds Susan's body.
I pray this doesn't become another Casey Anthony case and Josh Powell gets away with it.
Or worse, he gets those boys back.
The world is so full of injustice right now.
We all could could use more really big score.... right about now.... for the good guys.
Especially Susan Powell and her family.
What follows is a You-Tube Update on the case.
This is not to say sisters can't and aren't wrong in the false allegation department
However, I believe this sister, Jennifer, speaks the truth.
In Utah, Josh Powell took his two young sons from their warm home to go camping in the middle of freezing desert winter night.
The boys then were ages 2 and 4.
Shortly during, after, or before... Susan Powell, Josh's wife, the boys mother, disappeared.
POOF! Susan Powell is gone. No one can find her.
Though the search teams in the Utah desert have picked up a trail, a scent, a glimmer of possibility of a find.
Josh claims she left him and the boys for another man.
Like we, the world, her family, her own sons would believe that based on the evidence.
Josh even alleged she came on to his own father.
Puh-lease.
Study Susan Powell. She would never, ever leave her sons.
I didn't believe Josh's lies for a heartbeat.
Good thing the cops didn't either.
Regardless, after Susan Powell mysteriously disappeared...
(who according to her husband... abandoned everything she owned including her maternal instinct)
Josh Powell packed up his sons and moved to a town called Puyallup, Washington.... not too far from me... to live with his dad, Grampa, Steven Powell.
One major problem there.
Susan father in law, Steven Powell, is sex pervert, who especially like porno pictures of children and had quite an affinity for Josh's wife Susan... the subject of this blog post who has disappeared.
The way he harassed Susan was one reason she initially moved her from Puyallup to Utah in the first place .... to get away from Josh's dear old demented dad.
On August 25, 2011, after Susan's disappearance, Jennifer Graves, Josh's own sister, Susan's sister-in-law, spoke to the media and asked Josh's dad to stop "slandering Susan". http://www.fox13now.com/news/kstu-josh-powells-sister-says-susan-didnt-feel-safe-near-her-father-20110825,0,4879996.story
It seems Susan told her friends and family what was going down with her husband's dysfunctional family.
She also kept a journal of the nasty moves her father in law made around her.
People knew she was in a toxic situation.
Then, go figure... one icy, freezing, midnight, Josh takes his boys camping in the Utah desert.
They are 2 and 4 years old. Susan doesn't go. And Susan Powell is never seen since.
Josh decides to take the two boys and leave Utah rather than join the search for his wife. they went to live with his father, Steven Powell in Puyallup Washington.
So of course, the whole situation stinks bigtime and people are pretty freaked out both here and in Utah. Yet karma can really serve it back.
So Gramps, Steven Powell, was just busted, (amen) for his porn stash.
Here's the link to that story. He's still in jail now.
I just checked.
http://articles.nydailynews.com/2011-09-23/news/30214884_1_susan-powell-josh-powell-steven-powell
But Susan is still unfound.
And with Steven Powell, Grampa, now busted, behind bars here in Washington....
that left the boys living with a possible murderer. Their dad.
Yet there is a measure of good news in this sordid story.
The tides are turning now.
The courts have awarded temporary custody of the boy's to Josh's parents.
The temporary part is not good news.
For now however, the boys are safely in the loving, arms of very good people.
All while, Susan Powell's devastated family and friends, and really big-hearted strangers are still searching for what may remain of her body which I believe was buried or burned in the Utah desert.
And Josh Powell's own sister has gone on recor again, this time, saying he should never be awarded custody.
Check that out here: http://www.komonews.com/news/local/130734733.html?skipthumb=Y
I drove by Steven and Josh Powell's home again on my way home from a case in that area yesterday. It felt great to know the kids weren't there anymore... that Susan's parents won the custody battle...
and Josh's time is coming.
I pray the search parties, the police, dogs, someone... finds Susan's body.
I pray this doesn't become another Casey Anthony case and Josh Powell gets away with it.
Or worse, he gets those boys back.
The world is so full of injustice right now.
We all could could use more really big score.... right about now.... for the good guys.
Especially Susan Powell and her family.
What follows is a You-Tube Update on the case.
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
Fire And Rain
It is odd to me how people hold onto toxic relationships and just won't let go until those relationships poison and destroy them.
It is odder still how people are in toxic relationships and don't know it.
Those toxic relationships implode or explode and go down in flames.
I've been in a few toxic relationships in my life.
I suspect we all have.... or still are mingling.... among the toxic.
There are people among us who are toxic, " emotional vampires"
They walk beside us and flatter us with their pseudo-appreciation of us when all they really want to do is feed off of us.
Drain us dry.
Take what we have and move on.
It is a sad truth, albeit it a real truth.
It is a truth that keeps people like P.I.'s, Police, Therapists, legitimately and gainfully employed.
I am working cases involving users, liars, crooks, cheaters and thieves today...
so I think I will let the blog... and Adele's Song "Set Fire To the Rain'" reflect this P.I.'s mood d'jour.
Who hasn't felt like Adele has at one time or another?
I know I have.
And truth be told..
Setting fire to rain does bring with it... form of liberation.
It is odder still how people are in toxic relationships and don't know it.
Those toxic relationships implode or explode and go down in flames.
I've been in a few toxic relationships in my life.
I suspect we all have.... or still are mingling.... among the toxic.
There are people among us who are toxic, " emotional vampires"
They walk beside us and flatter us with their pseudo-appreciation of us when all they really want to do is feed off of us.
Drain us dry.
Take what we have and move on.
It is a sad truth, albeit it a real truth.
It is a truth that keeps people like P.I.'s, Police, Therapists, legitimately and gainfully employed.
I am working cases involving users, liars, crooks, cheaters and thieves today...
so I think I will let the blog... and Adele's Song "Set Fire To the Rain'" reflect this P.I.'s mood d'jour.
Who hasn't felt like Adele has at one time or another?
I know I have.
And truth be told..
Setting fire to rain does bring with it... form of liberation.
Sunday, September 25, 2011
"The Incredible Case of The PI Moms"
When I first heard this reality show was going on the air, I will admit, I was slightly bummed.
I had been asked to do a reality show or two before and declined....because they are not my "thing".
Then I heard about a new show allegedly airing on lifetime called "P.I. Moms"
I felt the show would demeaned the P.I. business.
I feel this business is much serious, professional, and legal-minded than the P.I Moms and their big Boss, Chris Butler... who likened himself to Charlie with his Angels... presented.
I saw them on Dr Phil and a few other shows on their media rounds and somehow felt my business, the PI business...and the hard work it takes.... was somehow diminished by the cocky and cavalier attitude of Chris and his bevvy of beautiful PI Moms.
They made it seem so easy.
Yet some of the things they did didn't sound to me... legal.
I got lucky this weekend when National Public Radio devoted a full hour of "This American Life" to very subject of the PI Moms. I knew none of this information. And I got to listen it to all of it during my long drive to my first case of that day.
I was determined, whenever I got to a space and place permitting, I would post the the full radio broadcast/podcast here.
Sit back and relax. It takes an hour...
though i promise it will be time well spent if the PI business interests you.
The story's incredible and TRUE!
Here's the link to radio prgrgram.
http://www.thisamericanlife.org/radio-archives/episode/447/the-incredible-case-of-the-pi-moms
If you don;t have time to listen now, here's a link to a great article about the subject.
http://uptownalmanac.com/2011/02/mommy-pi-boss-arrested-top-narc-shocker-drugs
I had been asked to do a reality show or two before and declined....because they are not my "thing".
Then I heard about a new show allegedly airing on lifetime called "P.I. Moms"
I felt the show would demeaned the P.I. business.
I feel this business is much serious, professional, and legal-minded than the P.I Moms and their big Boss, Chris Butler... who likened himself to Charlie with his Angels... presented.
I saw them on Dr Phil and a few other shows on their media rounds and somehow felt my business, the PI business...and the hard work it takes.... was somehow diminished by the cocky and cavalier attitude of Chris and his bevvy of beautiful PI Moms.
They made it seem so easy.
Yet some of the things they did didn't sound to me... legal.
I got lucky this weekend when National Public Radio devoted a full hour of "This American Life" to very subject of the PI Moms. I knew none of this information. And I got to listen it to all of it during my long drive to my first case of that day.
I was determined, whenever I got to a space and place permitting, I would post the the full radio broadcast/podcast here.
Sit back and relax. It takes an hour...
though i promise it will be time well spent if the PI business interests you.
The story's incredible and TRUE!
Here's the link to radio prgrgram.
http://www.thisamericanlife.org/radio-archives/episode/447/the-incredible-case-of-the-pi-moms
If you don;t have time to listen now, here's a link to a great article about the subject.
http://uptownalmanac.com/2011/02/mommy-pi-boss-arrested-top-narc-shocker-drugs
Friday, September 23, 2011
Surrender Is Not Sweet
I am late for my days cases and have a ferry to catch across what appear to be calm seas this morning.
Meantime, I am leaving the above video in my wake in the hopes that a few people I know...
who have told me recently they are despondent, depressed, broke, lost, lonely, hopeless... giving up... won't.
The world is not an easy place to live.
Especially now.
We are experiencing the highest unemployment rate, poverty and foreclosure levels in the US ever.
College costs are exceeded the ability to pay.
Even if you do have a job, have a home... property taxes will keep going up while you're home values keep going down.
Things are crazy out there.
And if you live in the US, you have it better than most.
Yet in here, in this P.I.'s head...
there is always hope.
A spark of promise, possibility.
A knowledge that every day above ground is good day.
And maybe you think stepping away into the big sleep will solve your problems.
It won't.
It will leave a legacy of confusion, pain, shame, regret and self doubt and self blame in the lives of all you have touched who have been unable to help you.
It will eliminate you from the possibility of a miracle turning your life around.
I see miracles every day.
People who are supposed to be dead and technically are... because i have seen that flat line with my own eyes.. come back to life.
The terminal are often reborn and outlive the rest of us.
Bullies become kind.
Haters become lovers.
Criminals find true redemption.
And no matter how dark the night(s), there is always a dawn.
The only time it is truly over.... is when you die or when you end your life.
There's no way back from that.
We have no choice about when we exit this planet when it is "our time"...
suicide is a whole different ballgame.
So as I rush out the door after I hit "post" on this blog...
my hope is one of those lost souls I know with holes in their boats will plug them.
One of those people who would rather go down on their sword than "be wrong", will simply surrender and extend or accept the olive branch.
There are other choices than sinking into the abyss of self-destruction.
Truth be told, I do not know if and when I return to this blog...
who will have given up and who will have sucked it up and moved forward.
All I can do is help navigate, provide direction... and pray.
Here's to smooth sailing to all who find this little blog today.
Meantime, I am leaving the above video in my wake in the hopes that a few people I know...
who have told me recently they are despondent, depressed, broke, lost, lonely, hopeless... giving up... won't.
The world is not an easy place to live.
Especially now.
We are experiencing the highest unemployment rate, poverty and foreclosure levels in the US ever.
College costs are exceeded the ability to pay.
Even if you do have a job, have a home... property taxes will keep going up while you're home values keep going down.
Things are crazy out there.
And if you live in the US, you have it better than most.
Yet in here, in this P.I.'s head...
there is always hope.
A spark of promise, possibility.
A knowledge that every day above ground is good day.
And maybe you think stepping away into the big sleep will solve your problems.
It won't.
It will leave a legacy of confusion, pain, shame, regret and self doubt and self blame in the lives of all you have touched who have been unable to help you.
It will eliminate you from the possibility of a miracle turning your life around.
I see miracles every day.
People who are supposed to be dead and technically are... because i have seen that flat line with my own eyes.. come back to life.
The terminal are often reborn and outlive the rest of us.
Bullies become kind.
Haters become lovers.
Criminals find true redemption.
And no matter how dark the night(s), there is always a dawn.
The only time it is truly over.... is when you die or when you end your life.
There's no way back from that.
We have no choice about when we exit this planet when it is "our time"...
suicide is a whole different ballgame.
So as I rush out the door after I hit "post" on this blog...
my hope is one of those lost souls I know with holes in their boats will plug them.
One of those people who would rather go down on their sword than "be wrong", will simply surrender and extend or accept the olive branch.
There are other choices than sinking into the abyss of self-destruction.
Truth be told, I do not know if and when I return to this blog...
who will have given up and who will have sucked it up and moved forward.
All I can do is help navigate, provide direction... and pray.
Here's to smooth sailing to all who find this little blog today.
Wednesday, September 21, 2011
Tuesday, September 20, 2011
Link To "Marijuana Interviews:The Dealer" by James Eaton
The following is a link to a fascinating interview by James Eaton with a marijuana dealer from "The Liberal Boomer."
I think the article is better placed here than Facebook.
In Washington State, medical marijuana has become a booming, almost legitimate industry.
It's okay to grow, buy and use here if you are a patient and have a card.
Still, Federal Laws aren't in sync -- so you are treading on precarious ground because the Feds will bust medical marijuana grow houses when the state won't.
And don't think you can walk down the street or drive your car smoking a joint.
You will get busted.
The legalization of medical marijuana has also taken a toll on those who used to deal it underground.
This interview reflects the change in the industry and in the life of the dealer.
Here's the link. I find it fascinating. And revealing.
http://theliberalboomer.blogspot.com/2011/09/marijuana-interviews-dealer.html
I think the article is better placed here than Facebook.
In Washington State, medical marijuana has become a booming, almost legitimate industry.
It's okay to grow, buy and use here if you are a patient and have a card.
Still, Federal Laws aren't in sync -- so you are treading on precarious ground because the Feds will bust medical marijuana grow houses when the state won't.
And don't think you can walk down the street or drive your car smoking a joint.
You will get busted.
The legalization of medical marijuana has also taken a toll on those who used to deal it underground.
This interview reflects the change in the industry and in the life of the dealer.
Here's the link. I find it fascinating. And revealing.
http://theliberalboomer.blogspot.com/2011/09/marijuana-interviews-dealer.html
Sunday, September 18, 2011
RE: The You Tube Below
I listen to the radio a lot because I drive a lot.
So yesterday, I heard about the You Tube below on one talk radio show. They played parts of it. Evidently, it's going viral. I even received a copy of it in my email from my dear sister, who thought it was a hoot.
I totally agree.
What happened, is this couple got their first computer... equipped with web cam.
They had no clue how to use it. So they activated the web cam, without knowing.
And the camera recorded their entire first encounter with their computer... without their knowledge.
The funniest part is really outside the box... the interactions between the two crack me up.
Grampa is quite the lady's man at the end.
Hopefully it is with this hot older couple's consent that whoever posted this on You-Tube has cut it loose.
I think this video is proof positive...
You never know what goes on behind closed doors, unless...
someone leaves a Web Cam on.
So yesterday, I heard about the You Tube below on one talk radio show. They played parts of it. Evidently, it's going viral. I even received a copy of it in my email from my dear sister, who thought it was a hoot.
I totally agree.
What happened, is this couple got their first computer... equipped with web cam.
They had no clue how to use it. So they activated the web cam, without knowing.
And the camera recorded their entire first encounter with their computer... without their knowledge.
The funniest part is really outside the box... the interactions between the two crack me up.
Grampa is quite the lady's man at the end.
Hopefully it is with this hot older couple's consent that whoever posted this on You-Tube has cut it loose.
I think this video is proof positive...
You never know what goes on behind closed doors, unless...
someone leaves a Web Cam on.
Saturday, September 17, 2011
Personal Injuries
It's fairly obvious I've been away from the blog way too long. That's because the blog is a thing I do when I have time to do it.
Lately, the personal injury part of my business has been very busy, so I have been very busy cleaning up after bad things happen.
That's how I think of personal injury investigation.
Bag things happening to good people.
Two vehicles collide.
Someone falls through rotting stairs.
A doctor leaves a surgical instrument inside someone's body cavity.
A baby is dropped on it's head.
A child is hit on a bicycle.
A teenager is shot by a bullet intended for someone else.
A drunk driver takes out a family of four.
A drug company markets a product they know is harmful.
A medical device is recalled and placed inside someone nonetheless.
A deck collapses.
A tire falls off a truck and crashes through a windshield.
A dog attacks a child.
An adult runs over kid.
Someone doesn't see a motocycle and hits it.
Someone doesn't like motorcycles and hits one.
A bus hits a telephone poles and the pole falls on someone at a bus stop.
A ladder breaks at a construchhtion site.
A door falls off a pile of doors on a customer at a large home repair store.
Someone falls on a sidewalk crack.
Someone breaks their back on spilled shampoo in a store aisle.
An amusement park ride turns from fun to nightmare because of a missing bolt.
A skidoo slices through a rowboat while two girls sunbathe.
These are the kinds of cases a personal injury investigator like me investigates.
Every day... every few hours... something different.
Most times, people live through this stuff.
Too many times my clients are dead and I speak for them through their families.
I put the puzzle pieces of all the cases together and deliver them to the attorneys.
So that would be why I have been away from the blog.
Each case is a multi-faceted process.
You talk to the victim. The witnesses. Study the police report. Photograph the scene. Measure the scene. You dig even deeper if you need to.
Then you package it all up without a bow and hand it to the attorneys.
Along with the coveted invoice.
Which seldom fully reflects the work you actually did because money is short for everyone in this economy.
So this would be why the blog has been silent for a while.
Lots of work... a good thing for the creditors...
a bad thing for the injured.
I made a few shifts in my little universe that will allow me to be here more often.
So please don't go away.
My goal is also to add more few more free public record links to left side of the blog every day.
I've got a book in progress and a dream of breathing new life into this blog.
Meantime, I will keep it up with a case or two in point... and on point.
Lately, the personal injury part of my business has been very busy, so I have been very busy cleaning up after bad things happen.
That's how I think of personal injury investigation.
Bag things happening to good people.
Two vehicles collide.
Someone falls through rotting stairs.
A doctor leaves a surgical instrument inside someone's body cavity.
A baby is dropped on it's head.
A child is hit on a bicycle.
A teenager is shot by a bullet intended for someone else.
A drunk driver takes out a family of four.
A drug company markets a product they know is harmful.
A medical device is recalled and placed inside someone nonetheless.
A deck collapses.
A tire falls off a truck and crashes through a windshield.
A dog attacks a child.
An adult runs over kid.
Someone doesn't see a motocycle and hits it.
Someone doesn't like motorcycles and hits one.
A bus hits a telephone poles and the pole falls on someone at a bus stop.
A ladder breaks at a construchhtion site.
A door falls off a pile of doors on a customer at a large home repair store.
Someone falls on a sidewalk crack.
Someone breaks their back on spilled shampoo in a store aisle.
An amusement park ride turns from fun to nightmare because of a missing bolt.
A skidoo slices through a rowboat while two girls sunbathe.
These are the kinds of cases a personal injury investigator like me investigates.
Every day... every few hours... something different.
Most times, people live through this stuff.
Too many times my clients are dead and I speak for them through their families.
I put the puzzle pieces of all the cases together and deliver them to the attorneys.
So that would be why I have been away from the blog.
Each case is a multi-faceted process.
You talk to the victim. The witnesses. Study the police report. Photograph the scene. Measure the scene. You dig even deeper if you need to.
Then you package it all up without a bow and hand it to the attorneys.
Along with the coveted invoice.
Which seldom fully reflects the work you actually did because money is short for everyone in this economy.
So this would be why the blog has been silent for a while.
Lots of work... a good thing for the creditors...
a bad thing for the injured.
I made a few shifts in my little universe that will allow me to be here more often.
So please don't go away.
My goal is also to add more few more free public record links to left side of the blog every day.
I've got a book in progress and a dream of breathing new life into this blog.
Meantime, I will keep it up with a case or two in point... and on point.
Wednesday, September 7, 2011
Saturday, September 3, 2011
Friday, September 2, 2011
Over Think, Overkill?
I've heard the say ing almost all my life.
"Overthink, overkill."
I am always overthinking, though I have yet to kill anything.
Still, I do get the point.
We obsess when we become concerned, anxious, worried.
Sopme of us can't sleep.
Other can't eat. or can't stop eating.
We tune the world out...
while we tune into our own emotional tuning fork that sounds, internally, like fingernails on a blackboard.
We can't stop thinking, worrying, trying to control that which is uncontrollable.
Truth be told, all this worry, anxiety, self-loathing we feel....
It's all in our heads.
If you can shift your thinking, you can shift your world.
"Overthink, overkill."
I am always overthinking, though I have yet to kill anything.
Still, I do get the point.
We obsess when we become concerned, anxious, worried.
Sopme of us can't sleep.
Other can't eat. or can't stop eating.
We tune the world out...
while we tune into our own emotional tuning fork that sounds, internally, like fingernails on a blackboard.
We can't stop thinking, worrying, trying to control that which is uncontrollable.
Truth be told, all this worry, anxiety, self-loathing we feel....
It's all in our heads.
If you can shift your thinking, you can shift your world.
Wednesday, August 31, 2011
It's A 911 Day
I've been away from the blog for a few days because I've been dealing with a family medical emergency.
Now that things have settled down, I am moving back into work.
And today, my head runs to three digits...911.
Maybe because we're moving close to the infamous date of 9-11 and the loss of so many lives at the hands of terrorists -- many of whom since have been taken down.
Another reason I keep running the number 911 through my head is because I ordered some 911 tapes for a client just now. They involve one lover calling 911 re: his lover's suicide... which some believe was murder.
And most important, 911 is in my head because if a medical emergency happens...
I know those three digits could mean the difference between life and death.
I listen to a lot of 911 tapes in the course of my work.
It was many moons ago that I came upon the following tape, which I find quite amazing, albeit grim.
Took me a while to find it again, so here it is.
The subject matter isn't pleasant, neither is the man making the call.
However, it is 100% real...
and that's what this blog is all about.
Reality. Which can often be quite disturbing.
Now that things have settled down, I am moving back into work.
And today, my head runs to three digits...911.
Maybe because we're moving close to the infamous date of 9-11 and the loss of so many lives at the hands of terrorists -- many of whom since have been taken down.
Another reason I keep running the number 911 through my head is because I ordered some 911 tapes for a client just now. They involve one lover calling 911 re: his lover's suicide... which some believe was murder.
And most important, 911 is in my head because if a medical emergency happens...
I know those three digits could mean the difference between life and death.
I listen to a lot of 911 tapes in the course of my work.
It was many moons ago that I came upon the following tape, which I find quite amazing, albeit grim.
Took me a while to find it again, so here it is.
The subject matter isn't pleasant, neither is the man making the call.
However, it is 100% real...
and that's what this blog is all about.
Reality. Which can often be quite disturbing.
Sunday, August 28, 2011
Methhead's Mama
It is Sunday morning. The hurricane on the East Coast is passing. That is a good thing.
My cell phone rang an hour ago.
I was not sure whether that was a good thing because the number was blocked.
I picked up anyway.
It was someone, a woman and mother, I have not spoken to for years.
She knew I am a P.I. and how to reach me because I gave her my card when I helped investigate her then minor son's case a while back, with the help of a personal injury attorney.
The case closed favorably.
The son acquired a settlement when he turned 18.
It was a BIG sum, she told me.
I seldom know what clients get in injury cases I work on because I tend to step away by that time. Sometimes they call and tell me.
The mom who called this morning, told me how much her son got in his injury settlement.
I said "Wow, that's alot for a young kid."
Then she said, "It's all gone."
"All of it?" I asked, trying to figure out how an 18 year old could blow all that money by the time he turned 19.
"All of it. " she said.
"Where'd it go?" I asked.
"Up his nose," she said.
If I said I was stunned, I'd be lying.
I hear about this all the time.
Young people get an injury settlement or inheritance and blow it.
This time, literally.
"How can I help?" I asked.
She then told me her was arrested for assault with a deadly weapon, the victim was in the hospital, in full view of witnesses.
It certainly didn't help that he had a bag of meth on him when the police searched him...
and was higher than a kite when arrested.
He was in seriously deep guano.
She said she couldn't afford a private criminal attorney and investigator... and asked if I would help.
I paused... then respectfully declined.
I decided to be blunt, to tell her what I know about Methamphetamine and people addicted to it.
How the first use for many is euphoric, followed by three solid days of energy... then a crash.
Then a craving, pursuit and use of more Methampheatmine.
I told her how Meth burns holes in the brain.
The holes never repair themselves completely.
I told her Meth is like an agent of living decomposition, it destroys the body from the inside out.
It rots the teeth.
It tries to escape through the skin and causes these bloody acne-like pock marks all over.
Then I went into the litany of other changes, physical and psychological.
I told her how sorry I was, that I could not help her.
Truth be told, I was sorry for her.
I felt no sorrow for her son.
It bothers me a bit I have hardened so much.
However, was his choice.
He had it all.... and he blew it.
So I referred her to the Public Defender Agencies and Private P.I,'s and Private Criminal Defense Attorneys who feed on such cases.
Then I asked for her email address.
I told her I wanted to send her something.
I didn't tell her I thought her ignorance about Meth was astounding.
Instead, I decided to help her learn that on her own.
So I sent her two things.
The video that follows.
And the Tim Burton video on Meth, which is longer...
and is listed on the links on the left side of this blog if you care to check it out.
Not a happy blog subject, I know.
Just a real one.
My cell phone rang an hour ago.
I was not sure whether that was a good thing because the number was blocked.
I picked up anyway.
It was someone, a woman and mother, I have not spoken to for years.
She knew I am a P.I. and how to reach me because I gave her my card when I helped investigate her then minor son's case a while back, with the help of a personal injury attorney.
The case closed favorably.
The son acquired a settlement when he turned 18.
It was a BIG sum, she told me.
I seldom know what clients get in injury cases I work on because I tend to step away by that time. Sometimes they call and tell me.
The mom who called this morning, told me how much her son got in his injury settlement.
I said "Wow, that's alot for a young kid."
Then she said, "It's all gone."
"All of it?" I asked, trying to figure out how an 18 year old could blow all that money by the time he turned 19.
"All of it. " she said.
"Where'd it go?" I asked.
"Up his nose," she said.
If I said I was stunned, I'd be lying.
I hear about this all the time.
Young people get an injury settlement or inheritance and blow it.
This time, literally.
"How can I help?" I asked.
She then told me her was arrested for assault with a deadly weapon, the victim was in the hospital, in full view of witnesses.
It certainly didn't help that he had a bag of meth on him when the police searched him...
and was higher than a kite when arrested.
He was in seriously deep guano.
She said she couldn't afford a private criminal attorney and investigator... and asked if I would help.
I paused... then respectfully declined.
I decided to be blunt, to tell her what I know about Methamphetamine and people addicted to it.
How the first use for many is euphoric, followed by three solid days of energy... then a crash.
Then a craving, pursuit and use of more Methampheatmine.
I told her how Meth burns holes in the brain.
The holes never repair themselves completely.
I told her Meth is like an agent of living decomposition, it destroys the body from the inside out.
It rots the teeth.
It tries to escape through the skin and causes these bloody acne-like pock marks all over.
Then I went into the litany of other changes, physical and psychological.
I told her how sorry I was, that I could not help her.
Truth be told, I was sorry for her.
I felt no sorrow for her son.
It bothers me a bit I have hardened so much.
However, was his choice.
He had it all.... and he blew it.
So I referred her to the Public Defender Agencies and Private P.I,'s and Private Criminal Defense Attorneys who feed on such cases.
Then I asked for her email address.
I told her I wanted to send her something.
I didn't tell her I thought her ignorance about Meth was astounding.
Instead, I decided to help her learn that on her own.
So I sent her two things.
The video that follows.
And the Tim Burton video on Meth, which is longer...
and is listed on the links on the left side of this blog if you care to check it out.
Not a happy blog subject, I know.
Just a real one.
Saturday, August 27, 2011
Re: Good Life
For those of you who follow this blog, you may have noticed I put up a post and then took it down, hours later.
Reason why?
It was stupid.
I knew better... felt was sort of borderline before I put it up.
However, after sharing the animated detective piece with my trusted crew, it got thumbs down.
Too long and boring.
I decided to take it down. Which, by the way, is what makes blogs so magical and fluid. You can take things down and put things up anytime you feel like it.
So, I felt... rather than just leave a hole in my little blog's soul until I can get here again... I'd post a song my daughter shared with me a while ago.
I came to love this song because it bridges the gap, I believe, between cultures and generations.
It speaks to what we all want... for ourselves.... and each other.
Reason why?
It was stupid.
I knew better... felt was sort of borderline before I put it up.
However, after sharing the animated detective piece with my trusted crew, it got thumbs down.
Too long and boring.
I decided to take it down. Which, by the way, is what makes blogs so magical and fluid. You can take things down and put things up anytime you feel like it.
So, I felt... rather than just leave a hole in my little blog's soul until I can get here again... I'd post a song my daughter shared with me a while ago.
I came to love this song because it bridges the gap, I believe, between cultures and generations.
It speaks to what we all want... for ourselves.... and each other.
Friday, August 26, 2011
Susan Powell Case Reawakens
I was not too far from Susan Powell's husband's house yesterday.
Susan Powell is a missing woman who allegedly showed up missing after her husband took his young sons camping in a snowstorm.
Excuse me... who goes camping in mid winter in the middle of the night with two small kids?
Family and friends suspect Josh, Susan's husband... who fled back to my area...the Pacific Northwest... to be with his father who now accuses Susan of coming on to him.
S'cuse me, but can you say B.S?
We saw it happen with Casey Anthony.
We saw it happen with OJ.
We could see it happen with Josh Powell -- one more evil spirit gets away with murder of an angel.
Susan Powell was a very good woman, according to those I've met who knew her.
Her husband is not a good guy.
In my opinion, both father and son are liars.
Police are looking hard for evidence right now as I write and head to that area yet again to work a different case.
Meantime, for this unfamiliar with this case, study it.
I suspect much will unfold in the days again.
Rumor is in the wind that lies are going to catch up with Josh and his father.
At the very least, I hope the children can land in the safer hands of the maternal family...
than killer dad and lying grampa.
In my opinion, the kids would be better placed, right now, out of the paternal environment.
To bad the system doesn't work that way.
Innocent until proven guilty.
Though in my head, the verdict's in.
Dad wanted the kids and got him.
Susan would never have left her children.
Susan Powell is a missing woman who allegedly showed up missing after her husband took his young sons camping in a snowstorm.
Excuse me... who goes camping in mid winter in the middle of the night with two small kids?
Family and friends suspect Josh, Susan's husband... who fled back to my area...the Pacific Northwest... to be with his father who now accuses Susan of coming on to him.
S'cuse me, but can you say B.S?
We saw it happen with Casey Anthony.
We saw it happen with OJ.
We could see it happen with Josh Powell -- one more evil spirit gets away with murder of an angel.
Susan Powell was a very good woman, according to those I've met who knew her.
Her husband is not a good guy.
In my opinion, both father and son are liars.
Police are looking hard for evidence right now as I write and head to that area yet again to work a different case.
Meantime, for this unfamiliar with this case, study it.
I suspect much will unfold in the days again.
Rumor is in the wind that lies are going to catch up with Josh and his father.
At the very least, I hope the children can land in the safer hands of the maternal family...
than killer dad and lying grampa.
In my opinion, the kids would be better placed, right now, out of the paternal environment.
To bad the system doesn't work that way.
Innocent until proven guilty.
Though in my head, the verdict's in.
Dad wanted the kids and got him.
Susan would never have left her children.
Monday, August 22, 2011
Sunday, August 21, 2011
Re: Interviews
Today is an interview day.
Fortunately, I need not leave my office this Sunday, all these interviews can be done by phone because I am sorting through a long lost of potential witness to determine who saw what.
Once I find people I think are key witnesses, I set up an in-person interview...
my ultimate goal being a report of interview, a statement, declaration or deposition.
Of course, getting a phone call from a P.I. on a Sunday can be disconcerting to some, so the job is not as easy as it may sound.
Credibility must be established, then trust and rapport.
And often, finding those interview subject isn't easy.
Many are rarely home.
I find many people on Sundays, especially Sunday nights. I think of it as my magic locate day.
The religious might say, the higher power is with me on Sundays.
However, interviewing is work, not worship.
Not only do you have to take word for words notes at the speed of light...
you have to be able to professionally elicit information from a wide variety of people with a whole slew of personality types.
Your list of questions has to be at hand, you have to know what you need and what you don't.
And everything you do must be done right so it can stand up in court.
The key to interviewing is as much physical as it is psychological.
Sometimes it requires a soft touch, other time, a more assertive one.
Ad very often, it requires acting.
You must get every bit of info you need from a subject...
and be able to chillax even when the person you are talking to is "difficult" or "different"
I have walked into rooms where people have instantly hated me "just because."
I employ techniques to turn those people from haters to allies.
In other cases, I have interviewed people with a few screws loose and I have to figure out how to screw them back in enough to find out what they know.
Which is why I included the You Tube below.
For those "House" Fans, yes indeed, that is Hugh Laurie.
I think its a good representation of how a very simple interview can turn out no so simple after all.
And besides that, it's a hoot.
So here's your Sunday funny.... while the 24/7 shift of a self employed P.I. continues ever onward.
Fortunately, I need not leave my office this Sunday, all these interviews can be done by phone because I am sorting through a long lost of potential witness to determine who saw what.
Once I find people I think are key witnesses, I set up an in-person interview...
my ultimate goal being a report of interview, a statement, declaration or deposition.
Of course, getting a phone call from a P.I. on a Sunday can be disconcerting to some, so the job is not as easy as it may sound.
Credibility must be established, then trust and rapport.
And often, finding those interview subject isn't easy.
Many are rarely home.
I find many people on Sundays, especially Sunday nights. I think of it as my magic locate day.
The religious might say, the higher power is with me on Sundays.
However, interviewing is work, not worship.
Not only do you have to take word for words notes at the speed of light...
you have to be able to professionally elicit information from a wide variety of people with a whole slew of personality types.
Your list of questions has to be at hand, you have to know what you need and what you don't.
And everything you do must be done right so it can stand up in court.
The key to interviewing is as much physical as it is psychological.
Sometimes it requires a soft touch, other time, a more assertive one.
Ad very often, it requires acting.
You must get every bit of info you need from a subject...
and be able to chillax even when the person you are talking to is "difficult" or "different"
I have walked into rooms where people have instantly hated me "just because."
I employ techniques to turn those people from haters to allies.
In other cases, I have interviewed people with a few screws loose and I have to figure out how to screw them back in enough to find out what they know.
Which is why I included the You Tube below.
For those "House" Fans, yes indeed, that is Hugh Laurie.
I think its a good representation of how a very simple interview can turn out no so simple after all.
And besides that, it's a hoot.
So here's your Sunday funny.... while the 24/7 shift of a self employed P.I. continues ever onward.
Saturday, August 20, 2011
Longings
This has been a week of longings.
Longing inside.... for the people I love in this world... to get, stay and be well.
Longing for a way to stop injustices I see swirling around me.
There appears to be no whirled peas.
And there has been a longing for this blog.
So before I hit the road again, I am hitting the keyboard.
A majority of my work as a P.I. is Personal Injury, meaning I work for lawyers with injured clients and legitimate claims against the DEF that caused that person's injury.
I find great satisfaction in this work because the attorneys I work for make a huge difference in people's lives.
There is no high quite like helping someone who is uninsured get treatment.
Or guiding someone who is lost to the attorneys who know the way and truly care about their clients.
According to many experts, a great cure for depression is volunteering, helping others less fortunate.
As a PI, I get paid to do that.
Though it is often difficult work.. because the injured I deal with, are seriously hurting and their body and lives are falling apart.
And not all the injured clients make it.
I write the word, "deceased", next to their name on my case file.
I work many death cases in the personal inury field.
And I also have my own death investigations, from private parties, the family or families of the deceased.
Most of those are homicide vs. suicide.
The families are convinced their loved ones were murdered and didn't commit suicide.
Often, this is true.
Most often, the murderer gest away with it.
So maybe I'm the only one noticing this.
It sure seems to me murders staged as suicides are on the rise.
With the economy tanking, many bad people are preying on good people for the almighty dollar.
Insurance policies are seductive pots and targets to those without moral, scruples and money.
Because so many marriages are ending... many over money issues....
it takes only one psycho to stall a divorce to reap maximum rewards.
And with so many people stuck in situations where they can't pay their mortage, and can't sell their home, adversarial couples are living together under the same roof with children.
It is not pretty.
And if there is an insurance policy in place...
and one loose cannon in a relationship just feels it's cheaper NOT to keep her (or him) alive...
we got murders staged as suicides.
Money is the motive for so many murders.
I know I have written about this subject frequently. That's because these cases don't go away.When the police and medical examiner investigate, that alone can be enough to make a determination, for example, of "suicide by self inflicted gunshot wound to the head."
The prosecutor may consider probing further, yet with budget cuts everywhere, there are not enough police detectives and prosecutors to investigate the huge ocean of cases.
Some ships sink unnoticed unless the family hires a Private Detective/P.I.
The family hopes we can get the case re-opened, the death certificate changed, the killer behind bars.
And if only it were that easy.
Even if you, as a P.I., are 100% convinced there's enough evidence to reopen a case, just getting the death certificate changed from suicide to "undetermined" is hard enough. Getting someone indicted and convicted for staging a murder as a suicide is very difficult. Truth be told, I have yet to be successful doing any more than getting death certificates changed except in one case.
There simply is not enough evidence for a grand jury to indict.
Now I tell my clients (being,the families of the murder victims whose death were staged as suicide),
that even if we do find the evidence, "Look at the Casey Anthony criminal case. Look at the OJ case. They were declared innocent in criminal court. Look at all the money the families spent. Think hard about how far you want to take this case."
In civil court, it turned out differently for OJ on the murder charge.
I also suspect Casey Anthony will have her hands full in the civil arena.
Maybe it's not cool to be this opinionated as a PI...however, I worked on neither case.
And I am entitled to my opinion.
I'd put all my money on the table Casey Anthony is guilty and murdered her child.
And I believe OJ Simpson killed Nicole and Ron.
Yet they both remained free for their crimes.
OJ, now behind bars, is at least... a broken man.
I have heard he has lost his celebrity status in prison.
Yet he didn't land there on murder charges. What got him to prison was a crime involving sports momentos.
How absurd is that?
Still, the families of the murdered were drained dry physically and financially by legal and investigative costs.
There is no joy in such matters.
The grieving never stops.
And justice is not served.
Today I send prayers out to the universe and hope someone up there is listening.
A lot of people are hurting right now and many folks on planet earth could use a helping hand.
May the righteous, honest and vigilant among us protect the weaker ones from the predators.
Today is a fine day to say grace.
Longing inside.... for the people I love in this world... to get, stay and be well.
Longing for a way to stop injustices I see swirling around me.
There appears to be no whirled peas.
And there has been a longing for this blog.
So before I hit the road again, I am hitting the keyboard.
A majority of my work as a P.I. is Personal Injury, meaning I work for lawyers with injured clients and legitimate claims against the DEF that caused that person's injury.
I find great satisfaction in this work because the attorneys I work for make a huge difference in people's lives.
There is no high quite like helping someone who is uninsured get treatment.
Or guiding someone who is lost to the attorneys who know the way and truly care about their clients.
According to many experts, a great cure for depression is volunteering, helping others less fortunate.
As a PI, I get paid to do that.
Though it is often difficult work.. because the injured I deal with, are seriously hurting and their body and lives are falling apart.
And not all the injured clients make it.
I write the word, "deceased", next to their name on my case file.
I work many death cases in the personal inury field.
And I also have my own death investigations, from private parties, the family or families of the deceased.
Most of those are homicide vs. suicide.
The families are convinced their loved ones were murdered and didn't commit suicide.
Often, this is true.
Most often, the murderer gest away with it.
So maybe I'm the only one noticing this.
It sure seems to me murders staged as suicides are on the rise.
With the economy tanking, many bad people are preying on good people for the almighty dollar.
Insurance policies are seductive pots and targets to those without moral, scruples and money.
Because so many marriages are ending... many over money issues....
it takes only one psycho to stall a divorce to reap maximum rewards.
And with so many people stuck in situations where they can't pay their mortage, and can't sell their home, adversarial couples are living together under the same roof with children.
It is not pretty.
And if there is an insurance policy in place...
and one loose cannon in a relationship just feels it's cheaper NOT to keep her (or him) alive...
we got murders staged as suicides.
Money is the motive for so many murders.
I know I have written about this subject frequently. That's because these cases don't go away.When the police and medical examiner investigate, that alone can be enough to make a determination, for example, of "suicide by self inflicted gunshot wound to the head."
The prosecutor may consider probing further, yet with budget cuts everywhere, there are not enough police detectives and prosecutors to investigate the huge ocean of cases.
Some ships sink unnoticed unless the family hires a Private Detective/P.I.
The family hopes we can get the case re-opened, the death certificate changed, the killer behind bars.
And if only it were that easy.
Even if you, as a P.I., are 100% convinced there's enough evidence to reopen a case, just getting the death certificate changed from suicide to "undetermined" is hard enough. Getting someone indicted and convicted for staging a murder as a suicide is very difficult. Truth be told, I have yet to be successful doing any more than getting death certificates changed except in one case.
There simply is not enough evidence for a grand jury to indict.
Now I tell my clients (being,the families of the murder victims whose death were staged as suicide),
that even if we do find the evidence, "Look at the Casey Anthony criminal case. Look at the OJ case. They were declared innocent in criminal court. Look at all the money the families spent. Think hard about how far you want to take this case."
In civil court, it turned out differently for OJ on the murder charge.
I also suspect Casey Anthony will have her hands full in the civil arena.
Maybe it's not cool to be this opinionated as a PI...however, I worked on neither case.
And I am entitled to my opinion.
I'd put all my money on the table Casey Anthony is guilty and murdered her child.
And I believe OJ Simpson killed Nicole and Ron.
Yet they both remained free for their crimes.
OJ, now behind bars, is at least... a broken man.
I have heard he has lost his celebrity status in prison.
Yet he didn't land there on murder charges. What got him to prison was a crime involving sports momentos.
How absurd is that?
Still, the families of the murdered were drained dry physically and financially by legal and investigative costs.
There is no joy in such matters.
The grieving never stops.
And justice is not served.
Today I send prayers out to the universe and hope someone up there is listening.
A lot of people are hurting right now and many folks on planet earth could use a helping hand.
May the righteous, honest and vigilant among us protect the weaker ones from the predators.
Today is a fine day to say grace.
Monday, August 15, 2011
Not a Good Life
When I asked her what her monthly mortgage is, she said this:
"$8,000 a month, but we haven't paid for months, who knows when they're going to foreclose?"
It took a conscious effort to contain my involuntary response. An $8,000 a month mortgage? Are you kidding me?
That's some default.
Here's the deal now...
She's got a child in private school and a brilliant husband who happens to have many college degrees, one includes law.
He is quite successful and conniving, yet he is pleading near poverty.
For some reason all of his business shut down just two months before the divorce.
Allegedly, all he is making now is 35k a year, so he says he can barely afford child support...
let alone the spousal support he agreed to when he could afford the 8k a month mortgage.
He wants spousal support eliminated.
They divorced five months ago but still live together because their mansion is in on the market,
and no one wants it.
After all, what's another multi-million house in a tanking economy?
Both live there together.... in their own rooms or suites or whatever...
divorced but co-habiting in the behind-closed-doors, mysterious way rich people do in their own private worlds.
My job was to find his hidden assets.
Which I couldn't do.
I looked under every rock I could legally overturn.
I've got maybe 100 pages of data.
Nada.
Meaning, nothing helpful to my client's case.
Certainly.... there could be off shore accounts. But I can't find them.
And alot of those off shore accounts, after the market crash, had their funds frozen or seized by banks/governments going under.
Either he is a great pretender.... hider...
or he, like so many, invested heavily in the stock market, lost it all.
She said, he claims that's what happened.
He said they got all their money in the market.
And lost it.
However, I read alot about him on the net.
He made major bucks as a high-powered attorney.
Based on the toys in their house....
from the high priced prestige cars to tennis court...pool... to the 50k wine collection...
it all lingers there, waiting to be repossessed.
I first heard her story in Starbucks.
I will be ending it at the post office today with a package, a case file, for her attorney.
In the course of this investigation, I may not have found more money, evidence of fraud...
however, we did find, since he had everything in his name...
that he got all the cell bills and records and saw the number for every call she made.
He put a keystroke monitor on the computer he bought her and is still is his name for the warranty.
He owned the cars in which the gps was placed.
He was on her like white on rice... and because he was an attorney he tracked/stalked her, legally.
So maybe I didn't find any more money my client could go after, post divorce because he lied pre-divorce, which could constitute fraud.
I did find a way to convince my client to finally leave her ex- husband and their 8k a month, soon-to-be-foreclosed-on house.... and move on.
My client is from a family of wealth, the family is paying my client's $350. an hour attorney bill.
My client's ex-husband is an attorney, so it costs him nothing financially to destroy her with motion after motion, hearing after hearing, arbitrations are endless.
I said her family's money would be best spent now that they are divorced building a new life...
getting a apartment or house to rent while she gets a job or a business going and gets back on her feet.This War of The Roses stuff, living together post-divorce, is nuts in my opinion.
Yet for so many, it's the only option.
It's hard enough to support one relatively happy household.... let alone two miserable ones while going under. I told her that her boat was sinking and it was time to abandon ship.
She'll be leaving her divorced husband next week.
It'll be up to the son, age 16, to decide who to stay with.
It is not a good life for her... or her son anymore... she said, over the phone last night.
I agreed, hung up... and went to bed grateful I was not sleeping in her world.
"$8,000 a month, but we haven't paid for months, who knows when they're going to foreclose?"
It took a conscious effort to contain my involuntary response. An $8,000 a month mortgage? Are you kidding me?
That's some default.
Here's the deal now...
She's got a child in private school and a brilliant husband who happens to have many college degrees, one includes law.
He is quite successful and conniving, yet he is pleading near poverty.
For some reason all of his business shut down just two months before the divorce.
Allegedly, all he is making now is 35k a year, so he says he can barely afford child support...
let alone the spousal support he agreed to when he could afford the 8k a month mortgage.
He wants spousal support eliminated.
They divorced five months ago but still live together because their mansion is in on the market,
and no one wants it.
After all, what's another multi-million house in a tanking economy?
Both live there together.... in their own rooms or suites or whatever...
divorced but co-habiting in the behind-closed-doors, mysterious way rich people do in their own private worlds.
My job was to find his hidden assets.
Which I couldn't do.
I looked under every rock I could legally overturn.
I've got maybe 100 pages of data.
Nada.
Meaning, nothing helpful to my client's case.
Certainly.... there could be off shore accounts. But I can't find them.
And alot of those off shore accounts, after the market crash, had their funds frozen or seized by banks/governments going under.
Either he is a great pretender.... hider...
or he, like so many, invested heavily in the stock market, lost it all.
She said, he claims that's what happened.
He said they got all their money in the market.
And lost it.
However, I read alot about him on the net.
He made major bucks as a high-powered attorney.
Based on the toys in their house....
from the high priced prestige cars to tennis court...pool... to the 50k wine collection...
it all lingers there, waiting to be repossessed.
I first heard her story in Starbucks.
I will be ending it at the post office today with a package, a case file, for her attorney.
In the course of this investigation, I may not have found more money, evidence of fraud...
however, we did find, since he had everything in his name...
that he got all the cell bills and records and saw the number for every call she made.
He put a keystroke monitor on the computer he bought her and is still is his name for the warranty.
He owned the cars in which the gps was placed.
He was on her like white on rice... and because he was an attorney he tracked/stalked her, legally.
So maybe I didn't find any more money my client could go after, post divorce because he lied pre-divorce, which could constitute fraud.
I did find a way to convince my client to finally leave her ex- husband and their 8k a month, soon-to-be-foreclosed-on house.... and move on.
My client is from a family of wealth, the family is paying my client's $350. an hour attorney bill.
My client's ex-husband is an attorney, so it costs him nothing financially to destroy her with motion after motion, hearing after hearing, arbitrations are endless.
I said her family's money would be best spent now that they are divorced building a new life...
getting a apartment or house to rent while she gets a job or a business going and gets back on her feet.This War of The Roses stuff, living together post-divorce, is nuts in my opinion.
Yet for so many, it's the only option.
It's hard enough to support one relatively happy household.... let alone two miserable ones while going under. I told her that her boat was sinking and it was time to abandon ship.
She'll be leaving her divorced husband next week.
It'll be up to the son, age 16, to decide who to stay with.
It is not a good life for her... or her son anymore... she said, over the phone last night.
I agreed, hung up... and went to bed grateful I was not sleeping in her world.
Sunday, August 14, 2011
Sundays
Every one has their own feelings about Sundays.
Today, on Sunday, this PI woke up thinking about a call I got last Saturday night from someone who found out the person they are with is not the person they thought.
Lies were the foundation of their relationship. Serial cheating is involved.
They have two kids.
And while the person who called said "why would she confess all this to me on a Saturday night?"
I was taken aback because the question was, to me at least, odd.
I could have' said, "because she was drunk" because she was.
Instead, I said, "Why would finding out on a Sunday be any better?"
And that, dear blog reader, is the point of the song below.
Today, on Sunday, this PI woke up thinking about a call I got last Saturday night from someone who found out the person they are with is not the person they thought.
Lies were the foundation of their relationship. Serial cheating is involved.
They have two kids.
And while the person who called said "why would she confess all this to me on a Saturday night?"
I was taken aback because the question was, to me at least, odd.
I could have' said, "because she was drunk" because she was.
Instead, I said, "Why would finding out on a Sunday be any better?"
And that, dear blog reader, is the point of the song below.
Saturday, August 13, 2011
Burnin' Love
When I encounter victims of repeated domestic violence -- physical, emotional, verbal abuse -- be they men or women, I always ask why they keep going back to the people who bring them harm.
The answer is either "because I love him/her" or, "because if I leave, he/she will kill me."
The first answer drives me batty, really. I've stopped arguing that point and usually just shake my head.
Really, I'm better off beating my head against the wall... than arguing the point that love is not meant to hurt.
My reaction to the second answer is more verbal and complex.
Because some people are really trapped in relationships so abusive, the decision and action of leaving actually generates greater violence. And death. Not just to spouses, but to children.
Domestic violence calls are among the most dangerous police officers face. Escaping those relationships in one piece, or alive, require some real tactical moves.
Yet some people are so afraid of being alone, they would rather get verbally or physically beaten up... than be alone and endure the pain of what they perceive as rejection/failure/whatever.
And some people simply think they can't make it on their own.
Solitude to me, is a blessing.
As is the company of a good person -- I'm all for a friend, partner, associate who treats me well.
However, cross a certain line in the sand and then you are dust in my wind.
The things is, there are people I care about now who are in relationships that are not good.
Or healthy.
The most dangerous ones are fueled by alcohol, drugs, or someone who has a few emotional screws loose.
Get a drunk couple talking about money issues... and issues with the kids... add alcohol or drugs...
and you've got combustion.
Certainly there are degrees of abuse, just like there are degrees of burns.
Some people resort to name calling, others prefer to control you.
Some find sarcasm at your expense amusing when it is really mean.
Some call you names behind your back.
Some choose to isolate you from family, friends, your prior hobbies/communities and others.
Some tell you what to do and how to act, dress, where to be and when.
Some plan to drain your bank account dry; or marry you, divorce you and take your house.
Some raise their voice, some shut down, others control you or play-act charm you...
until they have everything you own and then... kick you to the curb.
Remember the economy is tanking.
Predators a are everywhere.
All abusers, in my opinion, are control freaks. Bitter, angry people.
Many victims don't see the abusers coming... because abusers can be attractive, seductive charmers in the beginning.
That's how they pull you in.
The faster they trap you in their web -- entangle you financially and emotionally -- the faster they can suck your resources dry and cast your dumbfounded remains to the winds.
A fire is a fire.Abuse is abuse.
Whether someone puts you down... embarrasses you... degrades you... or slams your head against the wall, it IS abuse.
It is NOT okay.
And it must STOP.
Do not keep the abuse to yourself.
You have the choice of fight or flight.
I do not believe you can win a fight with an abuser.
Once police intervention fails, I like flight for my clients -- it does feel good to help people walk, escape, disappear, from their abusers.
Sometimes, runaway brides are wise.
It is far better to live alone happily...
than live with someone miserably.
So before you tie the knot with anyone, make sure that knot is not a noose.
Do not rush into a permanent commitment -- marriage -- without studying your partner.
Many abusers hide civil and criminal records and you don't find them until after you're locked in with a marriage certificate.
When a client asks me to run a background, I go through prior divorce documents looking for incidents of asset theft, fraud and domestic violence.
Often I find alarming indicators.
Yet when I share those with my client, they proceed anyway.
Despite every argument I can think of.
Despite all the evidence I can produce of past, multiple, miserable marriages.
Despite alienation of family and friends in the name of "love".
That's why I am posting the following song.
Chances are, you've heard it many times.
Now study the words.
Rihanna was a victim of domestic violence, the song she sings stems of her own experience with it.
Profits, from the song go to domestic violence victims.
The answer is either "because I love him/her" or, "because if I leave, he/she will kill me."
The first answer drives me batty, really. I've stopped arguing that point and usually just shake my head.
Really, I'm better off beating my head against the wall... than arguing the point that love is not meant to hurt.
My reaction to the second answer is more verbal and complex.
Because some people are really trapped in relationships so abusive, the decision and action of leaving actually generates greater violence. And death. Not just to spouses, but to children.
Domestic violence calls are among the most dangerous police officers face. Escaping those relationships in one piece, or alive, require some real tactical moves.
Yet some people are so afraid of being alone, they would rather get verbally or physically beaten up... than be alone and endure the pain of what they perceive as rejection/failure/whatever.
And some people simply think they can't make it on their own.
Solitude to me, is a blessing.
As is the company of a good person -- I'm all for a friend, partner, associate who treats me well.
However, cross a certain line in the sand and then you are dust in my wind.
The things is, there are people I care about now who are in relationships that are not good.
Or healthy.
The most dangerous ones are fueled by alcohol, drugs, or someone who has a few emotional screws loose.
Get a drunk couple talking about money issues... and issues with the kids... add alcohol or drugs...
and you've got combustion.
Certainly there are degrees of abuse, just like there are degrees of burns.
Some people resort to name calling, others prefer to control you.
Some find sarcasm at your expense amusing when it is really mean.
Some call you names behind your back.
Some choose to isolate you from family, friends, your prior hobbies/communities and others.
Some tell you what to do and how to act, dress, where to be and when.
Some plan to drain your bank account dry; or marry you, divorce you and take your house.
Some raise their voice, some shut down, others control you or play-act charm you...
until they have everything you own and then... kick you to the curb.
Remember the economy is tanking.
Predators a are everywhere.
All abusers, in my opinion, are control freaks. Bitter, angry people.
Many victims don't see the abusers coming... because abusers can be attractive, seductive charmers in the beginning.
That's how they pull you in.
The faster they trap you in their web -- entangle you financially and emotionally -- the faster they can suck your resources dry and cast your dumbfounded remains to the winds.
A fire is a fire.Abuse is abuse.
Whether someone puts you down... embarrasses you... degrades you... or slams your head against the wall, it IS abuse.
It is NOT okay.
And it must STOP.
Do not keep the abuse to yourself.
You have the choice of fight or flight.
I do not believe you can win a fight with an abuser.
Once police intervention fails, I like flight for my clients -- it does feel good to help people walk, escape, disappear, from their abusers.
Sometimes, runaway brides are wise.
It is far better to live alone happily...
than live with someone miserably.
So before you tie the knot with anyone, make sure that knot is not a noose.
Do not rush into a permanent commitment -- marriage -- without studying your partner.
Many abusers hide civil and criminal records and you don't find them until after you're locked in with a marriage certificate.
When a client asks me to run a background, I go through prior divorce documents looking for incidents of asset theft, fraud and domestic violence.
Often I find alarming indicators.
Yet when I share those with my client, they proceed anyway.
Despite every argument I can think of.
Despite all the evidence I can produce of past, multiple, miserable marriages.
Despite alienation of family and friends in the name of "love".
That's why I am posting the following song.
Chances are, you've heard it many times.
Now study the words.
Rihanna was a victim of domestic violence, the song she sings stems of her own experience with it.
Profits, from the song go to domestic violence victims.
Friday, August 12, 2011
Can't Stay Away.
Can't do it.
Can't step away from this blog.
Try as I might, I think about it day and night as a means by which to "expunge" the darker things I see... often.
Being a PI is nowhere near as tough as manning the battlefields as a soldier; the streets as a police officer; covering the ER or being a first responder on accident scenes.
Still, being a PI does have its "moments" when you think...
"Okay, this is not a good situation."
"This person is insane and.or a loose cannon."
"Oh yuk, this scene/shot goes way beyond disgusting to disturbing.
"Where is the nearest exit?"
It wasn't until a few days ago... one of my kids, who is really an adult now, informed me that most times I talk about my day as PI... when I walk it in the door... at dinner when we all talk... she has nightmares.
Always had, always will hated to hear me speak of my work, but never told me.
Go figure.
She doesn't find my tales of gore, brutality, destruction, twisted metal and bodies or domestic-battles from-hell enchanting?
No.
In fact they have horrified her for years. Yet it was only a few days ago she told me that all her life I have traumatized her, admittedly, unknowingly with my answer to that inocuous question, "what did you do today".
That was one of those uh-oh, vs. aha moments for me.
When I asked her, "Why haven't you told me sooner?"
She said "I thought you needed someone to share the stuff you see with."
I was touched. She was willing to take an emotional hit for me.
I thanked her for that.
Then she suggested if I have all these dark, gross stories inside me, maybe I should see a therapist or someone to get them out.
I told her I don't need to get it out, some people actually like true crime and I figured she was one of them until she said otherwise.
I have learned over many years,some people like my kind of stories, some do not.
So there are plenty of people to listen, when necessary.
I had not a clue my daughter hated, yet tolerated, these stories for my sake.
It is a profound revelation that caused me to pause.
That conversation also and ultimately, led to the point I am at now.
Blogging again.
After I said I wouldn't.
Guess I'm just realizing I do use this place as a sort of safe house, a place to cut loose.
It need not preclude a book...
rather, embrace the writing of it.
Like friendship and love... time too can expand exponentially.
I have also found through lots of emails, people actually like this blog.
Here comes another "go figure."
I have to hit the road quickly. Just want to breathe a little more life into this space, this blog place before I go... by sharing with something I was pondering on my morning rounds.
I have a Facebook friend, he just moved into a shelter with his wife....and she was (in my FB friend's mind) assaulted or harassed last night at the shelter. I have never met him. He's a regular person like you and me who was not as lucky as many and lost it all. It can happen to anyone, No job, home, insurance, income.... and down, down, down the rabbit hole we go.
I have conversed with him and I follow his page daily and I feel like I know him. So he was struggling with how to contain his emotions, his anguish, angst, in the shelter and "we", his FB friends, were rallying with advice, words of wisdom which really will do no good.
Meantime, I said bon voyage to a dear friend of mine who is about to embark on a 2 week cruise to the most faraway places... a trip costing upwards of 10k.
And I am thinking, "what is wrong with this picture?"
I don't think it has to be feast or famine for the whole human race.
People who lose everything do not "do it to themselves."
Some people are born into money.
Others earned every cent of enormous wealth legitimately and by working hard.
Many times, people are born into poverty.
And for the rest of us regular folks... stuff happens. Bad stuff. Medical, employment, emotional, deaths, divorces.... life can be hard, cruel and strip you down the bare bones.
It is important, if you are one of the people who "have" to realize America has now more "have-nots" than ever before. And besides money, the most help you can give a person who is down and out is dignity and respect.
Okay, I am sufficiently purged for the day.
Now time to let people know the blog is back.
If you don't mind, add a comment below so I know you stopped by.
Don't be shy. I have many friends named "Anonymous."
Can't step away from this blog.
Try as I might, I think about it day and night as a means by which to "expunge" the darker things I see... often.
Being a PI is nowhere near as tough as manning the battlefields as a soldier; the streets as a police officer; covering the ER or being a first responder on accident scenes.
Still, being a PI does have its "moments" when you think...
"Okay, this is not a good situation."
"This person is insane and.or a loose cannon."
"Oh yuk, this scene/shot goes way beyond disgusting to disturbing.
"Where is the nearest exit?"
It wasn't until a few days ago... one of my kids, who is really an adult now, informed me that most times I talk about my day as PI... when I walk it in the door... at dinner when we all talk... she has nightmares.
Always had, always will hated to hear me speak of my work, but never told me.
Go figure.
She doesn't find my tales of gore, brutality, destruction, twisted metal and bodies or domestic-battles from-hell enchanting?
No.
In fact they have horrified her for years. Yet it was only a few days ago she told me that all her life I have traumatized her, admittedly, unknowingly with my answer to that inocuous question, "what did you do today".
That was one of those uh-oh, vs. aha moments for me.
When I asked her, "Why haven't you told me sooner?"
She said "I thought you needed someone to share the stuff you see with."
I was touched. She was willing to take an emotional hit for me.
I thanked her for that.
Then she suggested if I have all these dark, gross stories inside me, maybe I should see a therapist or someone to get them out.
I told her I don't need to get it out, some people actually like true crime and I figured she was one of them until she said otherwise.
I have learned over many years,some people like my kind of stories, some do not.
So there are plenty of people to listen, when necessary.
I had not a clue my daughter hated, yet tolerated, these stories for my sake.
It is a profound revelation that caused me to pause.
That conversation also and ultimately, led to the point I am at now.
Blogging again.
After I said I wouldn't.
Guess I'm just realizing I do use this place as a sort of safe house, a place to cut loose.
It need not preclude a book...
rather, embrace the writing of it.
Like friendship and love... time too can expand exponentially.
I have also found through lots of emails, people actually like this blog.
Here comes another "go figure."
I have to hit the road quickly. Just want to breathe a little more life into this space, this blog place before I go... by sharing with something I was pondering on my morning rounds.
I have a Facebook friend, he just moved into a shelter with his wife....and she was (in my FB friend's mind) assaulted or harassed last night at the shelter. I have never met him. He's a regular person like you and me who was not as lucky as many and lost it all. It can happen to anyone, No job, home, insurance, income.... and down, down, down the rabbit hole we go.
I have conversed with him and I follow his page daily and I feel like I know him. So he was struggling with how to contain his emotions, his anguish, angst, in the shelter and "we", his FB friends, were rallying with advice, words of wisdom which really will do no good.
Meantime, I said bon voyage to a dear friend of mine who is about to embark on a 2 week cruise to the most faraway places... a trip costing upwards of 10k.
And I am thinking, "what is wrong with this picture?"
I don't think it has to be feast or famine for the whole human race.
People who lose everything do not "do it to themselves."
Some people are born into money.
Others earned every cent of enormous wealth legitimately and by working hard.
Many times, people are born into poverty.
And for the rest of us regular folks... stuff happens. Bad stuff. Medical, employment, emotional, deaths, divorces.... life can be hard, cruel and strip you down the bare bones.
It is important, if you are one of the people who "have" to realize America has now more "have-nots" than ever before. And besides money, the most help you can give a person who is down and out is dignity and respect.
Okay, I am sufficiently purged for the day.
Now time to let people know the blog is back.
If you don't mind, add a comment below so I know you stopped by.
Don't be shy. I have many friends named "Anonymous."
Friday, August 5, 2011
Eulogy?
I'm not sure what to do with this blog.
I don't really have a clue who really reads it... or cares.
There's a comment section below every post, though I don't get a whole lot of comments, usually one or two every now and then.
While my stat counter shows readership all over the world, over 16k readers...
and advertisers appear to love it...
ultimately, this blog is a time consuming effort for no financial, or really, emotional, return.
You just sort of throw the words out there and hope someone cares... or cares enough... to read them and learn. If you're lucky, someone comments.
.
As some already know from previous posts, I am struggling with pushing the blog button...
the button that puts the blog on hold for a while...
so I can write a book and worry less about what goes down here.
I figure, that way, I can write my alleged book in three months.
Meantime, no worries for blog readers.
There are over 700 posts here... lots of reading for those who may have just arrived to this place.
People watch TV re-runs. Read some books multiple times. Maybe the same hold trues for blogs.
So this will be it for a while on the posts I write that take me deeper into the underbelly of this business. That will come with the book... which will also be more instructional in nature.
I'll visit the blog daily for a number of reasons...
To look for comments after this last post and see if anyone really wants the blog anyway.
Occasionally, I may add A You tube that is too intense, or adult, for my FB wall.
I plan to continue to add to the blog's lists of investigative links at the left.
My ultimate goal... is to keep this blog space alive, while I get a book out there.
Then the blog will revive itself.
Just like that!
Oddly though, this feels like some kind of eulogy... so I'll leave a parting song in my wake.
If you're game, leave a parting comment below.
Meantime, you know where to find or friend me.
On Facebook.
I don't really have a clue who really reads it... or cares.
There's a comment section below every post, though I don't get a whole lot of comments, usually one or two every now and then.
While my stat counter shows readership all over the world, over 16k readers...
and advertisers appear to love it...
ultimately, this blog is a time consuming effort for no financial, or really, emotional, return.
You just sort of throw the words out there and hope someone cares... or cares enough... to read them and learn. If you're lucky, someone comments.
.
As some already know from previous posts, I am struggling with pushing the blog button...
the button that puts the blog on hold for a while...
so I can write a book and worry less about what goes down here.
I figure, that way, I can write my alleged book in three months.
Meantime, no worries for blog readers.
There are over 700 posts here... lots of reading for those who may have just arrived to this place.
People watch TV re-runs. Read some books multiple times. Maybe the same hold trues for blogs.
So this will be it for a while on the posts I write that take me deeper into the underbelly of this business. That will come with the book... which will also be more instructional in nature.
I'll visit the blog daily for a number of reasons...
To look for comments after this last post and see if anyone really wants the blog anyway.
Occasionally, I may add A You tube that is too intense, or adult, for my FB wall.
I plan to continue to add to the blog's lists of investigative links at the left.
My ultimate goal... is to keep this blog space alive, while I get a book out there.
Then the blog will revive itself.
Just like that!
Oddly though, this feels like some kind of eulogy... so I'll leave a parting song in my wake.
If you're game, leave a parting comment below.
Meantime, you know where to find or friend me.
On Facebook.
Thursday, August 4, 2011
Blog Drive-By
I know I've been away from the blog way too long. Busy time.
Meantime, I'm off to meet the guy below and thought I'd leave his first You Tube in my wake.
Meantime, I'm off to meet the guy below and thought I'd leave his first You Tube in my wake.
Friday, July 29, 2011
Tuesday, July 26, 2011
Lies
I am heading out now to see if I can get a liar to fess up. I have exactly 10 minutes to leave, two hours to drive one way. I ponder ways to crack the lie....
And I think how much people lie every day....
and how many lies are told in the name of love.
Yet people with nothing to hide, they hide nothing.
So why lie?
Really?
Then this song came into my head. So I figured, what the heck. It's amazing what people say and do for love. Nothing says it better than this. Be safe and well blog readers until this PI returns.
And I think how much people lie every day....
and how many lies are told in the name of love.
Yet people with nothing to hide, they hide nothing.
So why lie?
Really?
Then this song came into my head. So I figured, what the heck. It's amazing what people say and do for love. Nothing says it better than this. Be safe and well blog readers until this PI returns.
Sunday, July 24, 2011
Keep your Friends Close and Your Enemies Closer.
If you haven't heard it, you just might find the song that follows is not what you expect. I think there's a little bit of it in all of us.
Saturday, July 23, 2011
One More Death Investigation
She is a new investigator and she never worked a homicide vs. suicide case before.
My job is to help the family determine if the conclusion of the police and prosecutor were right... that my client's deceased daughter, let's call her "Sally," killed herself, with a self-inflicted, gunshot wound to her head.
To figure it all out, we had to study the case file, evidence... and review the police and autopsy photos closely because the family was unwilling to look at the pictures.
The scene photos were grim. Everything ugly, sad... with blood and brain matter spattered.
Then pictures of things... a gun, pillows, a spattered wall, close-ups of Sally's dead hands and fingers.
I recall an ashtray filled with half-smoked cigarettes.
The hole in Sally's head the bullet made.
The ugliness of such a death.
Just as we had done with the police file, I asked the other PI to talk to me as we went through every page together. To tell me everything she observed, wondered about, thoughts that ran through the illuminating magnifying glass of a brain she has. I wanted another perspective. I took notes.
I watched my newbie Death Investigator closely as we moved to the autopsy photos.
She handled herself well and professionally, though I could tell, she was taken aback.
"I've never seen anything like this before" she said, as I began to move through the thick stack of police pictures.
I didn't tell her I have seen way too much of it. I just continued on through the photos.
This was real.
On those true crime TV shows and horror movies... you know, viscerally, "this is not real".
In Hollywood, they have a school that trains people to act like corpses so the crime shows can use living actors on autopsy tables and crime scenes.
Real life death is ugly and not entertaining.
Because when you look at a dead person, it's like looking in a mirror.
And when you see a brain just splayed out on a table, part of pulverized... you know you have a brain and don't ant it to end up this way.
Or you see a woman younger than you lying naked on an autopsy table, photographed from afar by a stranger... you wonder, then pray, you never have such a shot of you somewhere.
You think all kinds of things.
And these photos were among the ugliest I have seen.
And even now as I blog about it, I thank the heaven's above the family hired me to look those photos so they would never have to.
I think the other PI and I agree. This case could go either way.
It could have been murde.
However, the woman was indeed unstable and had attempted suicide multiple times.
Plus, we both saw what happened with Casey Anthony and OJ Simpson in the criminal arena when there is what many believe true evidence of murder.
No way the family paying us could get enough evidence or money required to get it, if it existed, to indict the boyfriend.
Now I await the CD's I ordered from the police, so I can further study the crime scene, the pictures and write up a case report based on my notes, my associate's observations and all gathered evidence.... that will hopefully put the mother, father and sister of the deceased at some sort of peaceful acceptance of their beloved's death.
I did speak with the Police Detective on the case before we went to see the crime photos. He was pretty certain it was suicide and had compelling reasons why. I told him families often hire me after a suicide to get a death certificate changed to homicide because they blame someone else -- either because they truly believe it, or because they can not accept suicide.
The Detective agreed whole heartedly.
He said it is very difficult for police to tell a family member one of their own killed themselves... they would rather place blame than move to acceptance.
Someone once said "when a person truly goes mad or gives up, they take one of two ways out, suicide or homicide."
I believe yes, he may have killed her. I also think there's a chance she killed herself.
I just know, there is no way I can prove murder, especially if the police and prosecutor don't believe it
So what would you do with that.... really?
Let the family sink all of their life savings into a losing battle?
Think I'll just tell them the truth -- it's was a fatal 50/50 shot, suicide or homicide.
And the chances of their getting a homicide conviction against a man we have no evidence did it ar zero to nil.
It's hard for a P.I. to let a case like this go.
However, it's the right thing to do for a client/family with barely enough money to keep their bills paid, the lights on.
Without the police and prosecutor behind them, justice will cost money they simply do not have.
Time to pick up the pieces and carry on.
Friday, July 22, 2011
Bin Laden Sea Hunt?
I've been hearing about this guy Bill Warren and his rather bizarre mission for quite a while and was highly skeptical about it all... until I did a little research on Bill's background.He's serious alright. And the guy is no quack.
It's not about the money he said, because the bounty hunting part is past.
And I don;t buy the "it's not about the money part" because Bill is, after all a treasure hunter.
Plus, there is definite money on the table and a documentary in the wings.
And now and opportunity for a ride-along.
Yet according to Bill, it's about proving Bin Laden is really dead and this isn't some kind of elaborate cover up.
From what I have heard of how Bin Laden's body was disposed of and wrapped, it may just be found. All it could take is one person who was aboard on the Navy ship that dropped the body to talk to Bill.
A sort of water wiki leak with just a few key coordinates.
If you're interested in joining the hunt or donating to the cause... which I am not... there is a fascinating link to Bill's site anyway.... The Bin Laden Sea Hunt. It's at the end of this post.
I'll also post a great story about the search on my Facebook page next.
The You Tube that follows also follows the hunt.
While I can think of better things to do with my time than hunt for Bin Laden, there are other people who believe the whole Bin Laden takeout and burial at sea was a conspiracy.
Like the whole 911 attack.... the conspiracy theorists claim the Twin Towers and consecutive attacks were done not by terrorists, but our own government. In this bloggers opinion, that is a major crock.
And yes, I personally do believe our government took Bin Laden down and dropped his body at sea.
If Bill Warren wants to make sure of that, or get the body as some kind of sick treasure and profit from it, well I guess it's his call. It will make a fascinating documentary.
What you think of this situation depends how you think.
I personally think it's fascinating, bizarre and may just happen.
Here's a link to full story about the hunt from the Ron and Don Show and My Northwest.com here in Seattle. http://mynorthwest.com/?nid=108&sid=515961
Click the next line, if you want to support, join, or read about the hunt from Bill's site.
http://binladenseahunt.com
Tuesday, July 19, 2011
Sunday, July 17, 2011
One Word To Cheaters.
Don't.
If you do cheat... leave.
Just pack up your stuff, head out of the house and go somewhere else. To your lover's, a motel, a friend's, relative's, sleep in your car.
If you cheat, just leave.
It makes things so much easier.
You are obviously not meant to be married and you are harming someone who has committed his or her life to you.
When you know for a fact your spouse is cheating... file separation papers, so they can't continue to to cheat you financially.
Get separate attorneys when someone cheats on you, because they will continually cheat you financially throughout the divorce. If they hook up with a dude or dudette who wants your money, that's two against one. Have no doubt, a cheater will always turn on you in divorce/financial proceeding.
Cheating is a battle, divorce is a war.
If the cheater begs you to please come back.... that they're sorry... it was an aberration... and they want you to try therapy, I sure wouldn't blame you for trying. Though I wouldn't put money on the table you will get past it. Like an animal with that first taste of blood, once a cheater almost always a cheater. Never does the suspicion go away and suspicion is no good for a relationship.
I wouldn't stay with a cheater.
The minute someone betrays me in such a vile way, that person is history.
However, you are you.
And whatever you do, no one can control you but you.
Just know... if you cheat.... you will be found out. No if's and buts here.
And if you have kids... someone like me... A PI.... or your soon-to-be-ex... and/or his or her friends, will be on you like white on rice. The kids are innocent and you have betrayed them too.
Know that once your cheating is uncovered, we PI's are not rogue.
We work with Divorce Attorneys, DSHS and the police.
We help weave a net of protection around our clients, the ones who are being cheated on.
Or defrauded. Or lied to.
The thing that blows me away, not just as a PI, also as your average person, is why the cheater thinks they will be able to get away with it?
The minute a new lover enters a domestic equation, it's like the universe sends up red flags and there is no way your affair is not only obvious to your spouse, but everyone around you.
With more and more people meeting in the workplace, Facebook and classmates.com, more and more affairs and cheating are happening. The economy is failing and predators are looking for others to support their financial habits.
Remember, sex or "falling in love" is a drug. For many, an addiction. It releases hormones, it makes people crazy and nothing matters but them and their new partner or partners. It is an addiction you are powerless over. Cheating and alcohol/drugs are often intertwined.
I am writing this now to release my pent up angst so I can work on a few cases involving...yes... cheaters!
Go figure.
There are certain deal breakers in a marriage-- cheating and addiction.
When kids are involved, the dangers rise exponentially.
Because a woman never knows if the man she is cheating with is a good guy or Ted Bundy in disguise.
People lie all the time. Many sex offenders and pedophiles on the internet target women with children, to go after the kids.
Many bored, lonely, or money hungry women on the internet target men they think have money.
There are two deal breakers in a marriage/relationship.
Addiction and cheating.
When it comes to cheating, I believe there is no middle ground.
And I think those who think alternative lifestyles with several partners or wives are delusional.
One of many partners will bring an STD into the equation and that will bring death.
Not a reasonable price to pay, in my humble opinion, for a cheap thrill.
If you do cheat... leave.
Just pack up your stuff, head out of the house and go somewhere else. To your lover's, a motel, a friend's, relative's, sleep in your car.
If you cheat, just leave.
It makes things so much easier.
You are obviously not meant to be married and you are harming someone who has committed his or her life to you.
When you know for a fact your spouse is cheating... file separation papers, so they can't continue to to cheat you financially.
Get separate attorneys when someone cheats on you, because they will continually cheat you financially throughout the divorce. If they hook up with a dude or dudette who wants your money, that's two against one. Have no doubt, a cheater will always turn on you in divorce/financial proceeding.
Cheating is a battle, divorce is a war.
If the cheater begs you to please come back.... that they're sorry... it was an aberration... and they want you to try therapy, I sure wouldn't blame you for trying. Though I wouldn't put money on the table you will get past it. Like an animal with that first taste of blood, once a cheater almost always a cheater. Never does the suspicion go away and suspicion is no good for a relationship.
I wouldn't stay with a cheater.
The minute someone betrays me in such a vile way, that person is history.
However, you are you.
And whatever you do, no one can control you but you.
Just know... if you cheat.... you will be found out. No if's and buts here.
And if you have kids... someone like me... A PI.... or your soon-to-be-ex... and/or his or her friends, will be on you like white on rice. The kids are innocent and you have betrayed them too.
Know that once your cheating is uncovered, we PI's are not rogue.
We work with Divorce Attorneys, DSHS and the police.
We help weave a net of protection around our clients, the ones who are being cheated on.
Or defrauded. Or lied to.
The thing that blows me away, not just as a PI, also as your average person, is why the cheater thinks they will be able to get away with it?
The minute a new lover enters a domestic equation, it's like the universe sends up red flags and there is no way your affair is not only obvious to your spouse, but everyone around you.
With more and more people meeting in the workplace, Facebook and classmates.com, more and more affairs and cheating are happening. The economy is failing and predators are looking for others to support their financial habits.
Remember, sex or "falling in love" is a drug. For many, an addiction. It releases hormones, it makes people crazy and nothing matters but them and their new partner or partners. It is an addiction you are powerless over. Cheating and alcohol/drugs are often intertwined.
I am writing this now to release my pent up angst so I can work on a few cases involving...yes... cheaters!
Go figure.
There are certain deal breakers in a marriage-- cheating and addiction.
When kids are involved, the dangers rise exponentially.
Because a woman never knows if the man she is cheating with is a good guy or Ted Bundy in disguise.
People lie all the time. Many sex offenders and pedophiles on the internet target women with children, to go after the kids.
Many bored, lonely, or money hungry women on the internet target men they think have money.
There are two deal breakers in a marriage/relationship.
Addiction and cheating.
When it comes to cheating, I believe there is no middle ground.
And I think those who think alternative lifestyles with several partners or wives are delusional.
One of many partners will bring an STD into the equation and that will bring death.
Not a reasonable price to pay, in my humble opinion, for a cheap thrill.
Saturday, July 16, 2011
Friday, July 15, 2011
Love Boat Sinking
She is sinking fast and the hand she normally reaches out to...the hand that has almost always been there to grasp hers...
is no longer there, except to provide a shove deeper into the abyss.
I am watching this.
I watch this all the time on domestic cases.
It's been a year since I've done as many domestic dispute cases as I am doing now -- being infidelity, divorce, custody crises that often occur with the coupling/uniting and then disengaging of two people.
In matters of relationships and marriage, I expect a certain self-destruct rate.
However, I never expected the failure rate to run so high.
Statistically I hear it quoted now that 50% of all first marriages end in divorce.
75% of second marriages end in divorce.
And I know a load of people going on marriage three.
I just did a background on a woman going into her fifth marriage. She is only in her 50's.
Yes, sometimes it works out.
My second marriage has lasted a decade and we are as happy as the first day we met, if not happier.
And three of my closest friends' third marriages are going on well over a couple decades.
However, when you marry someone who has been married four or five times, I think your chances of success are slim.
In successful remarriages, it is because the families blended well, the people who married dated a long time.... endured several conflicts, fights and challenges.
Many second, third, fourth divorces need not have happened had a couple lived through one year of life's cycles, seasons and holidays and realized, once the hormones worn off, they were/are incompatible.
These divorce statistics may be fairly startling to some... yet lucrative to others, like attorneys, P.I.'s, DSHS, courts and those who earn a living doing the battle of finding chinks in domestic armor.
Even though Washington is a no-fault divorce state, and whether someone cheats or not doesn't really matter except to expose one person to a partner's betrayal.
it's a whole different story when or someone brings a venereal disease into the equation.
And it's even more complex... when funds are co-mingled.
Especially in this economy, when houses aren't selling, people own lots of property and those property values have declined while property taxes continue to increase.
More mature couples marry a second or third or even fourth time, co-mingle their debts and assets and all hell breaks loose.
During the lovey-dovey period, people hide their dark financial sides and emotional secrets.
That's what I am paid to uncover.
You work domestics long enough and you can see the trouble coming, see the damages before the hit.
When no children are involved, I tend not to get involved.
I say "get a divorce and get over it."
However, where there are kids involved, who I consider the innocent party -- my antenna goes up automatically.
I do everything I can to deescalate any conflict between the sparring couple by emphasizing the "put the needs of the children first" equation.
Because what is especially dangerous to kids..... besides a divorce or separation... and the children being used as pawns by the parents...
are the later weeks, months, years.... when new partners are found.
Sometimes the new partners blend with your kids. Sometimes they don't.
I have a case now where a new spouse hates her new husband's children.
She already got his only son moved out in under a few months even though dad had custody.
It's the bad seeds... the bad lovers, fiancees, spouses that P.I'.s deal with when things go horribly bad.
That said, let me say something to all you folks out there looking for love.
Be careful.
Very very careful.
It is much better to live alone happily than to live with someone miserably.
In the old days, people lived together after marriage.
Not so anymore.
And truth be told, I think that's wise.
Live together. Times have changed,
I believe people should live together as long as humanly possible before getting married.
It is impossible...in my opinion...to know the true nature and direction of a committed relationship until after the estimated 9-12 months for the hormones the body/mind produces to wear off.
Once a baby enters the arena it's a whole different equation, so I won't go there.
I believe a marriage is the best thing for couple who conceive a child together and truly love each other.
However, for many of us, the blush of youth has faded... one marriage came and went...
and then another arrived.
I am on my second.
The best part of my first marriage was the wonderful children they produced.
It is those children and the children of my new husband, besides the integrity of the man I am with, that have brought my second marriage the greatest joy.
My first marriage was no fun.
This second marriage is the light in my life and the real thing.
So the big question is this:
How do you know?
How do you know if the person you just fell in love with is baiting you...
or planning to try to change you?
How do you know if the alleged new love of your life is after your money, or a servant, or fancy house that they have no clue could be mortgaged, or refinanced, to the hilt?
How do you know if the person you are dating is a narcissist, control freak, talks about you behind your back?
Beyond running court records for past divorces, liens, judgments, warrants, multiple marriages and reading through divorce files, county assessor records regarding the financing behind properties owned or acquired through prior divorces...here are some signs to looks for:
1. Quickie Wedding: You or the other person you just started dating.... or dated once and just reunited with after years... is pushing for a fast marriage (4 months or under) unless someone's pregnant. If you dated years and years earlier, like one of those Classmate.com reunions, and you count the time together in your time of knowing each other.... forgertaboutit. The clock starts ticking on the date you start dating again.... because something broke you up in the first place.
If you are pushing for a fast marriage, it's probably because you are desperate to marry.
Or they have something you want or think will "complete" you --friends, a life, a job, assets.
If the other person is pushing for a hasty marriage, the same applies. They want something from you they are unwilling to wait for.
2. Employment: When one person works, the other doesn't, the one who works will inevitably resent, nag and detest the non worker. No way around it.
3. Family Dynamics: Look at the family relationships of the person you are marrying. How tight are they with their children? How tight is your new honey with their soon-to-be step children? Since your new love has entered your life, has that love alienated any of your family or friends? If so why?
4. Alcohol or Drug Use -- if you both drink, every evening, often, whatever, it won't work.
As people age, they absorb alcohol differently. Especially women who really do not process alcohol well in later years. Add menopause or "malepause" to the equation and you've got combustion.
5. Social Circle Limits -- if one person has a group of friends the you are excluded from, warning sign.If one person takes a social trip you are not invited on, warning sign. If one person thinks he or she knows everything, warning sign.
6. Isolation -- another a key warning sign. What I mean by that is if you are consumed by your new partner to the exclusion of others in your home or life you have known a long time. That is, I suppose, to be expected. However, very often the new partner gets drunk, yells at, or says bad stuff to your own kids about you behind their backs, and the kids are too scared to tell you, so they won't. That's because kids know you will believe your lying girlfriend or boyfriend and call them... your own kids... liars. Your new boyfriend or girlfriend will make your kid out to be crazy.
7. Judgmental personalities -- People who think they are better than you, smarter than you, work harder than you, judge your kids, your friends... are to be avoided at all costs. Google narcissist. That says it all. Have your two best friends spend an evening or weekend with your soon to be spouse. Listen to their feedback. I have yet to meet one person I have known all my life who does not like my husband.
8. Screamers-- do not marry one. If you are both screamers, forgetaboutit. Life is dramatic enough. Love is all about love and compromise. Not control. Not changing the other person.
The best a relationship will EVER be is in the very beginning 1-9 month hormonal dating period.
From there, it is all downhill. The question is, can you handle the inevitable downhill slope?
If your fights end up in screaming matches, slammed doors, major drama, step away. If the person you are with never apologizes for a mistake in judgment towards you, or others, step away. Apologies are important successful marriages. Every story has three sides -- yours, mine and the truth.
9. Money Spenders -- Money is the number one cause of divorce besides problems with the kids/step-kids. If you are hemorrhaging money during your dating/marrying period, buying expensive new items to accommodate your controlling partner's desires, wanderlust, hobbies.... close the money tap now. If you have money, get a pre-nup.
10. Drama -- true love is seamless, simple. It flows beautifully. Friends and family join in one loving sacred embrace. If one person controls the other, takes the leads, calls the shots and creates drama in your world rather than enhancing your family life... get premarital counseling. It's short term and a whole lot cheaper than a divorce which, at the low end, can run each party well over 10 grand.
All of this, every bit of it, is happening in four cases I am working now.
Two couples getting married. And two divorces.
It is neither pretty or pleasant.
And it all could be or could have been avoided if everyone slowed down, chilled, and looked closely behind the masks we put on everyday before we marry, co-mingle lives and funds... and then destroy family and life long relationships.
All it takes is one good winter of discontent to reveal what happens when your new love tweeks out.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)