Sunday, July 25, 2010

10 Things PI 's Know That You May Not

1. You never know what goes on behind closed doors. Do not envy another person, couple, family; their good lucks, fancy houses, vacations, spa getaways and expensive toys because they may not be what they appear to be. It is only when people are safely hidden from public view do they remove their masks and allow their true essence to emerge.

2. You can not change other people, you can only change yourself and change your response to the negative behavior of others. Sometimes, that negative behavior changes because you've changed. Sometimes it doesn't. The people who don't change are probably toxic and you don't need them in your life anyway.

3. People lie all the time. Insurance companies lie. Politicians lie. Family members and friends lie. Some lies are harmless, meant to make you feel better about yourself when you don't feel good about your self image. Other lies more deliberate and self-serving. Some people are such good and frequent liars, they truly believe their own lies.... because they can't cope with the truth.

4. There are many truths in silences. Usually if you don't fill in the silence, the person you are talking to will. And if they don't, the silence has meaning in it.

5. It is easier to tell the truth than it is to lie. People who lie talk more and their story changes in the telling. People who tell the truth tend to act indignant when falsely accused and tell the true story, consistently.

6. Most of us are a whole lot better than our last bad act. Some of us are not.
Some people made mistakes, acted badly and  are worthy of forgiveness.
Other behaviors are unfathomable and unforgivable.               

7. People with nothing to hide, hide nothing.

8. The best indicator of future behavior is past behavior.

9. Abusive behavior is cyclical. The abuser is a charmer at first to lure the bait to the hook. Then the abuser does his/her user/abuser thing. This usually occurs after drinking and/or drugging. Sometimes alcohol and drugs aren't involved, sometimes its the own chemicals in our body -- or learned behavior -- that make some of us go ballistic.
The abuser will then sober up or straighten up; apologize; exhibit real or feigned humiliation and remorse; then charm...and entice the abused.
Then the cycle of abuse begins again.
If you are being verbally, emotionally and/or physically abused you have two primal responses -- fight or flight.
I believe it is best to chose flight.
Once a person is angry, you can not reason them because their emotions and rage are engaged...
not their brain.

10. Drinking distorts the lenses of our perceptions. It is a depressant and therefore, makes some people very depressed and some very angry, aggressive, violent, or feeling desolate and abandoned.
Alcohol also causes some people to have conscious "blackouts." Many people under the influence of alcohol  appear normal... yet engage in  atypical or bizarre activities without being aware of it.  It causes untold deaths of drinkers and the people they drive into or harm in an outburst of alcohol induced violence or madness.

To find out if you have an issue with drinking, just go here. You'd be surprised how many people are alcoholics and don't know it.

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