Monday, June 25, 2012

Motivation On Monday

Today, I'm all about motivation... self-motivation... because it's just what I need to take a running start and lift off into another week of vast unknowns. Normally the lift-off and trajectory into a week of investigation is a both a thrill and pleasure. Sometimes I even step off at the very top of the roller coaster.  This morning, it is different. I can't find the adjective. Surreal. Third worldly. Uncertain. There is a unusual ripple beneath the surface of calm with which I choose to approach Mondays. 
I DO know why.
I have had a mix of way too much bad stuff go down in the past few weeks.
Start with death threats and on-going hate mails from a recent post about a cold case.
Stir in an excessive amount of personal turmoil.
Add a crash or two...
And the end brew is a wicked one.

I confess. The stress has been a bit much for me lately.
Still, it's way less stress than most people are experiencing now.
So really, I'm not complaining, just releasing.
In freeing my thoughts, I free my spirit.
And I hope,  also to free other living spirits who feel imprisoned by an injustice, loneliness, despair, their past, their financial desperation. Life is a raw, visceral experience when you live on the edge.
So many people are uncertain about the future. So many feel empty, lost, hopeless. Alone.
That loneliness.... I have both experienced,  witnessed and stared into it.
Loneliness and/or desperation form a huge, black, soul-sucking void. 
It takes great courage and strength to not jump in, or be sucked in...when you feel the options are limited.
Some of us feel like nothing more than ants in the colony,  hamsters on the wheel, empty shells.
And unless you have a secure job and a savings account...
or a whole tribe of family and friends...
You may be feel like most people on this planet these days --  alone, broker than broke and worried about the next meal. Or worse, whether you want to... or can... make it to the next day.
I am in a safe place. A safe house.
Many are not.
I'm going to see a family of five (three minors) today who I am thinking will lose their house because of their breadwinner's injuries.
So I woke up, determined to  be motivated,  to be positive.
I went first for the toothbrush, then the dogs and their walk, then to my email.
More hate mail here and on Facebook.
So this morning I said... Enough.
Today I turn the tables on the negative energy.
So I'm going to post one of my favorite all-time motivational videos on Facebook.
And I am posting another video here. This one,
while "schmaltzy"....AKA corny....
says what I would say if I wrote a blog post about what I believe without pictures.
Once, when I was at the very bottom of the earth, in as deep a hole as I could ever be in...
feeling unloved, unwanted, hated, alone, in despair...
a voice said to me..."attitude is everything."
So I looked at myself and realized, truly, it is my own attitude that determines not only my day...
also my fate.
I climbed out of that great big hole. It took me years and years. One pile of mud after another had to be cleared away.
Bottom line, it happened for a reason.
Which has me wondering...
maybe it's  the same reason you found your way to this blog and the You tube below...
I hit send now and cast these words in into the cyber wind.
Like a note in a bottle,... and like all bloggers I suppose...
I hope these words find you.

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