Friday, April 29, 2011
Stand by Them
Sometimes, all some people want is for someone to just stand by them.
Nothing more or less than that.
Just "stand by me."
It's not to much to ask in this often crazy and cruel unpredictable world.... is it?
I go into a stranger's house, I'm doing an investigation and more often than not, someone else is there.
A friend, a parent or two, grandparent, child, a beau, sibling, aunt , uncle, cousin, neighbor from downstairs. The guy next door.
I expect other people present when I am interviewing someone.
I am not the police, after all.
I am a Private Investigator.
An anomaly, a curiosity, an unknown.
And I deal with the public -- being a lot of injured people who are suspicious of a P.I. in their home.
I work on behalf of their attorneys.
I investigate their cases.
At the same time, as an independent contractor licensed by the state, I look out for the injured.
So it always helps to have a second set of ears in the room when you start talking about a case.
That's why the song "Stand By me" means so much to me.
I am always pleased when injured people have someone to stand by them.
I know it's hard...
really hard...
to stand by someone you love when you think they are losing it.
Or you know for a fact they have lost it.
Yet stand by them you must.
It is the only way we can all stand strong against the forces of nature and life that sometimes sweep us of our feet and knock our breath away.
Just know this:
When you stand by someone, you may have to move aside your value judgments for a while.
You may have to step away from criticism.
And you will have to bite your tongue. Literally.
Everyone's life is equally important.
No one's life is any greater than your own just because they have more money or things or people or prestige in it.
What matter, what really matters, is that you stand by someone... if only just once... to know how good it can feel.
The John Lennon version above is my favorite.
For so many reasons.
Nothing more or less than that.
Just "stand by me."
It's not to much to ask in this often crazy and cruel unpredictable world.... is it?
I go into a stranger's house, I'm doing an investigation and more often than not, someone else is there.
A friend, a parent or two, grandparent, child, a beau, sibling, aunt , uncle, cousin, neighbor from downstairs. The guy next door.
I expect other people present when I am interviewing someone.
I am not the police, after all.
I am a Private Investigator.
An anomaly, a curiosity, an unknown.
And I deal with the public -- being a lot of injured people who are suspicious of a P.I. in their home.
I work on behalf of their attorneys.
I investigate their cases.
At the same time, as an independent contractor licensed by the state, I look out for the injured.
So it always helps to have a second set of ears in the room when you start talking about a case.
That's why the song "Stand By me" means so much to me.
I am always pleased when injured people have someone to stand by them.
I know it's hard...
really hard...
to stand by someone you love when you think they are losing it.
Or you know for a fact they have lost it.
Yet stand by them you must.
It is the only way we can all stand strong against the forces of nature and life that sometimes sweep us of our feet and knock our breath away.
Just know this:
When you stand by someone, you may have to move aside your value judgments for a while.
You may have to step away from criticism.
And you will have to bite your tongue. Literally.
Everyone's life is equally important.
No one's life is any greater than your own just because they have more money or things or people or prestige in it.
What matter, what really matters, is that you stand by someone... if only just once... to know how good it can feel.
The John Lennon version above is my favorite.
For so many reasons.
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